Thread: Costume Addicts Anonymous

$400 is not a steal, it's a mortgage payment!

Sob, yet again.

Aaaah, puff, I am walking in the hall of shame with sisters.

Originally Posted by anala

$400 is not a steal, it's a mortgage payment!

Sob, yet again.

oh girl...we pay WEEKLY...

NO!

Originally Posted by anyadance

oh girl...we pay WEEKLY...

That makes more sense! I was very confused and thinking "where the heck do you LIVE!" at $400 a month? Cardboard box under the E Street bridge?

Hi my name is Elise and I think I have a friend who has a problem.

Originally Posted by palmier

Hi my name is Elise and I think I have a friend who has a problem.

Hi Elise!

Originally Posted by maliam

Hi, My name is Malia and I'm a costume-aholic. Last year I bought 15 costumes. Though I sold many others, even some that I bought and only had for a few days, I still bought 15 costumes. It is an obsession.

This year I vow to buy only two costumes, and to make any others I may want. To help me achieve this goal, I will no longer spend countless minutes perusing the Swap Meet pages and fantasizing about how this or that costume would make me look/feel. Or thinking about how this offer only comes around every-so-often so I must act on it. Instead, I will take those countless minutes and use them more productively to work on my own costumes, make new choreographies, sharpen my improv skills, work on zilling, etc. I vow to no longer let my obsession of costumes take up so much of my time.

I also vow to no longer allow myself to let having x number of costumes or x designer costumes weigh in on how I view myself as a dancer. Instead, I will use my new-found free time to further myself as an artist. When I begin to feel stagnant, I will not turn to a new costume to revamp myself. Instead, I will focus on making an impact on those who I share my dance with and search for a deeper understanding of myself through this art.

I'm asking anyone willing, help me be accountable for this. If you see me on the Swap pages seeming interested in something, tell me no! I'm working towards having more self-control in order to have more happiness in my life.

Thank you!

No, no, please, stop! don't tell me this. I don't want to listen to it!
I don't smoke, I don't drink (too much), I am not a junkie, I don't buy any expensive clothes, make-up, perfumes, shoes.. I don't have a car and I am going everywhere by bus..
I need to be additcted to something. Please let me have all those costumes. It's not so bad. Don't make me feel like I have some serious problem.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.
It's ok to be costume-aholic.

and chocoholic too.

Did I tell you I rescued a kitty from a street? I deserve all those costumes!!!

Ok...how ever you justify...but you did come to meeting didnt you...so why are you here, Sandra?

Well darn. Reality is seeping in through my computer screen. No idea how many costumes I own. There is plenty of fabric, fringe, beads, & appliques to create more lurking in the sewing room. Hmmmm, do I join? Count me as a maybe.

For the ladies who purchased 14, 15, 16+ costumes in one year. I'm impressed!

Seriously, I have to ask - how can I be a belly dancer and NOT be a costume addict? Isn't that half the business/fun/inspiration? If I were into art for the music, I'd still be playing in an orchestra.

My mom used to take me to see the bellydancers when I was a kid, and what do you think I remember? The costumes! And the flavor of the miyas. But, the two go hand in hand. Tina Sargent told me never perform the same choreography in the same costume for the same audience. I have always felt that crest of disappointment if I see somebody dance in the same suit. I get over it within a few minutes, but still! Isn't the whole point of the opening of a piece to set the flavor and let people enjoy your costume?

And, costumes are not even THAT expensive when you include the money you receive after re-selling it. Dance in it, take off some amount of money, and resell it. Your wardrobe will be fresh, someone else's wardrobe will be fresh, and if I'm in the audience I won't have costume ennui.

NOW, what I do see, and had struggled with myself for about a year, is the gambler's rush on the swap pages where you get caught up in thinking, "oooh, I have to post that I want that costume this VERY SECOND or
*gasp* another dancer is going to get it! OMG!!!." That isn't fun or healthy, and finally I've found that just sitting back and dancing and thinking about it until I am sure I will love it is the perfect solution. Once I started doing that, addressing the REAL problem which was my weird competitive gambler impulse on the swap pages, I began buying only the costumes that really did just spark my inner belly dancer. If that is an addiction, I embrace it.

I hope this helps.

happy dancing,

Alimah

Come on over to the dark side girls!
We can go visit my rhinestone wholesaler, pick out some silk to dye and go downtown where they will show you all the latest sequined and stretch fabric from Paris. Did I mention metallic stretch mesh in every color and sparkly animal print?
After that we will visit my friend who hand dyes pearls to match any fabric.
Then we will rent tons of great movies from the 80's drink wine, eat oreos, brie and baguettes and pass out under piles of holographic spandex after we decide what we are going to make with all the loot!
Welcome to my day ladies! The dark side......bwah ha ha ha ha!!!!

What is with this compulsion to get us to swap sides???? Could it be......dare I say....repressed guilt! Come clean, ladies...a few hail Marys and all will be forgiven...come into the light children...all are welcome....

Originally Posted by eshtabellydance

Come on over to the dark side girls!
We can go visit my rhinestone wholesaler, pick out some silk to dye and go downtown where they will show you all the latest sequined and stretch fabric from Paris. Did I mention metallic stretch mesh in every color and sparkly animal print?
After that we will visit my friend who hand dyes pearls to match any fabric.
Then we will rent tons of great movies from the 80's drink wine, eat oreos, brie and baguettes and pass out under piles of holographic spandex after we decide what we are going to make with all the loot!
Welcome to my day ladies! The dark side......bwah ha ha ha ha!!!!

OMG!!! It's Christmas! This should be marketed as the perfect belly dancer's vacation.

I'm not going to count what I bought in 2008, egads it was fun. Now my taste has fully developed and I'm selling a bunch today, and next month, and…

I was able to shift some dollars into workshops instead of costumes. Hummm, I'd not ready to admit anything yet. But where there is life, there is hope!!!

Yes yes! come to belly dancer's vaction! If it makes you feel any better after we go shopping we can dance!

Originally Posted by naiyahayal

.w.:

heh-heh ........ I'll be waiting over here on the Dark Side if anyone wants to come back ....... I will have chocolate, some good brandy and lots of crystals waiting to welcome you back ....... bragahhhhhaaahhhaaaaaa

I'll be waiting, too... Bella in hand.... Heh heh heh...

Originally Posted by anala

What is with this compulsion to get us to swap sides???? Could it be......dare I say....repressed guilt! Come clean, ladies...a few hail Marys and all will be forgiven...come into the light children...all are welcome....

Seriously! Ladies, those of us who are trying to be better could really use the actual support rather than the oh-so-tempting crystals you're waving in front of us! ..l;,

For myself, I posted this thread for the exact reasons I stated; buying costumes has been distracting for me and has suppressed why I'm really here to dance. It's not to be sparkly and beautiful and catch everyone's attention by blinding them with crystals (as much as I DO love all this). When I started dancing part of it was because I was drawn to the costumes. Now I feel I've matured past it (for myself) and really want to focus on something more meaningful in dance.

I once saw a dancer I truly admire do the most beautiful and exquisite dance I've seen. The movements were so light, so deep, so delicious, so everything. And all this was in a man's galebaya and a brightly-colored coin hip scarf. I recently saw this dancer again in a simple-made costume (albeit with TONS of sequins) and then in a folkloric costume. It has made me re-think my view of needing a fancy costume to catch people's attention.

For myself, learning to truly be a dancer and entertainer will only come after I surrender my obsession and allow something better to replace it. I am *positive* that one day I will return to the dark side! ..l;, Until then, I truly need to focus my energies elsewhere.

On that note, you ladies KNOW you're just in denial! Trying to justify all this bad, sparkly and shiny behavior ..l;,..l;,..l;,..l;,

At least you came to the meeting.....that is a step forward!


ETA: Please, no one feel I'm dogging on you if you do like buying costumes. There are those of you already at a place of better dancing that you don't need to back-off of costume buying. You've gone through your major learning phases. I'm just now entering a growth-phase (the kind you feel coming) and for too long have been ignoring it and trying to convince myself getting new costumes is all I needed to feel complete as a dancer. So again, those who love the costumes (and you know I love you too!) and those who sell costumes, this is in no way trying to deter you from that. This is simply for those of us in the same boat as myself :D

Originally Posted by eshtabellydance

Come on over to the dark side girls!
We can go visit my rhinestone wholesaler, pick out some silk to dye and go downtown where they will show you all the latest sequined and stretch fabric from Paris. Did I mention metallic stretch mesh in every color and sparkly animal print?
After that we will visit my friend who hand dyes pearls to match any fabric.
Then we will rent tons of great movies from the 80's drink wine, eat oreos, brie and baguettes and pass out under piles of holographic spandex after we decide what we are going to make with all the loot!
Welcome to my day ladies! The dark side......bwah ha ha ha ha!!!!

Oh man is this tempting. Must......control......myself.....

I think one of the two costumes I'll be buying this year will be from you. I keep thinking about that gorgeous goddess costume with the rouched tube skirt.

Oh no! I'm doing it again!!!! Fantasizing about how I would look/feel in it...

Hello, I'm Edna and I am a costume addict! My closet is starting to overflow with belly dance clothes and I'm just a baby belly. I vow to minimize time spent on the swap pages and start practicing more frequently.

Originally Posted by SirenoftheSun

Hello, I'm Edna and I am a costume addict! My closet is starting to overflow with belly dance clothes and I'm just a baby belly. I vow to minimize time spent on the swap pages and start practicing more frequently.

Hi Edna!

Welcome Edna...a great first step!!! There is no costume, no CD, no worksop, no DVD that contains what you are looking for...magic. There is only sweat!

Anala, you just have a wonderful way to getting to the heart of the matter!

Edna

Hi Edna

haha my friends last night told me i need to join a support group like this...
let's see...lol

Originally Posted by zfejzic

haha my friends last night told me i need to join a support group like this...
let's see...lol

i think it would be a good idea...i see you quite a bit on the swap pages ;)

Anala, you just have a wonderful way to getting to the heart of the matter!

Ask me how much this insight cost me over the last 7 years???

Fagedaboudid.

Originally Posted by zfejzic

haha my friends last night told me i need to join a support group like this...
let's see...lol

..l;, I feel awful now for helping support your addiction! ..l;,

Originally Posted by maliam

..l;, I feel awful now for helping support your addiction! ..l;,

lol at a gig last night i wore one of my newer costumes (i've had it for a couple of months but never a chance to wear it) and they're like 'my god zana, how many costumes do you have?!' me: ,r:; lol!

well i might as well 'join'...can't make any promises since it's only january and to declare this for the rest of the year...hmmm ..l;,

but i will try not to custom order a red & silver costume until i at least sell my red & gold bra and belt set (hint hint nudge nudge ladies). i have to pay off a custom order in may so that deed is done lol and i really want this yellow & orange yasser i saw (specially since i just sold my only yellow costume).
i am being a good girl in that no longer do i feel the need to have every color of the rainbow...but that may be because i already have every color of the rainbow.....l;,..l;,..l;,
can't help paying for troupe costuming but all in all i'm going to try to limit these purchases to the 3 (2.5 really? lol) costumes i mentioned above. .p::

oh but i'm kinda mad at myself now that i'm selling the fabric i was going to use to make a costume for
i wanted to focus my attention on the ones i have more details in mind..oh well, if i still want to make another one after attempting to make the 2 i have in mind, i'll just buy the fabric again