Thread: Two Things: Big Boobies and Boy Shorts

OK, so I have a large, natural chest. Always have, always will. I like them, my boyfriend likes them, others like them. However, my boyfriend has a problem when I show too much cleavage. He just gets kinda protective and feels like I shouldn't "share" my breasts with the world. LOL! I feel comfortable with how much I show, but he doesn't. What do you think is ok and what is too much?

Also we were talking about how my boobs might not serve me as well since I market to women, primarily. He thinks they would intimidate women. I said, I try to make women comfortable because I am round and curvy.



And now onto boy shorts. I was at Walmart the other day and they now have all their bikini's in. I was wondering if anyone wears bikini bottoms under their costumes? Like the boy short kind or other. I was thinking it would be nice. I need turquoise. I could replace the nylon liner with a cotton one. Anyone tried this?

one

- that's definitely not too much for me.. ;-). i like cleavage and cant see why i should hide. if i know i'm dancing really upclose to people, i go for my more covering costumes sometimes though.

- two, yes, i buy bikini shorts for some costumes, especially the ones with danger of some underwear being visible. i try to get colours mathcing the costume, and then if they are visible, they look as part of the costume rather than underwear

I think you look gorgeous! There is a lot of cleavage, yes, but I'd be more concerned with the side-boob it looks like you've got going on in that bra. Do they...uh...stay put in that costume?

1. Pfff, people pay good money to get cleavage like that. I probably will, someday! Love your curves. I totally agree that other women identify well with a rounder, softer look. You never look like you're falling out of your costumes, so don't worry about it.

Is your boyfriend a new beau? Or are you relatively new to performing? Even if he approves of your dancing, he might still be wrapping his head around the finer points of performing and costuming - i.e. that people will look at you. It took me awhile to get comfy with my boyfriend photographing girls in lingerie as part of his photography business - even though 90% of them are his lesbian friends.

2. Swimsuit bottoms are a great idea! They're often Lycra, after all, and some are even shimmery. Wish I thought of that! Now I'm off to Target.

Just watch for panty lines - sometimes, the seams on swimwear can be bulky.

i think what you are showing is fine. I think that it is very hard for any man that loves a women who dances because you are showing alot of skin. I love to show a lot of skin and my hubby always wants to see me before i go out and he says i show either to much leg, hip or cleavage . but that is only cause he like my costume and he knows other will as well. i just smile and go out the door. wear what you like as long as you feel comfortable in it. my hubby would probly like me to go out in a tent but i would not get many gigs that way. but also be kind and reasuring!

wanted to add: you look fantastic!!!!!!

I think your cleavage is fine! I mean, it's natural and not like you've deliberately done something to make yourself overtly sexeee. Plus, you're not pulling porno faces or leaning boob-first into the camera, and it's all well covered. So seems decent to me!

Boy-shorts - I like these. I always feel safer in a giant pair of knickers! I'd rather my audience know I'm wearing underwear than be concerned that I'm not. Matching them to your costume colour is an extra-good idea.

Yeah, they stay put. However, I have gained a little bit of weight since I bought that costume and it used to look more modest. For most performances now I wear something with a little less action. ;)


Here's the blue, from um, my skinnier days...
Picasa Web Albums - Megan
Picasa Web Albums - Megan

My first reaction to your picture was that it looks proportionate. In other words, your hips match your bustline. It looks beautiful and as I tried to be objective for your boyfirend's sake, I had to side with you. I think making women comfortable has less to do with a certain size of appendages and more to do with total package and attitude. You look cute as a button, friendly and fun.

Even though, being the proud owner of two depleted socks, (I envy envy envy ANYONE with boobage) if I saw you perform I wouldn't think you are showing too much at all. I think the costume fits well and the overall image is just fine. And I like your point about making women feel comfortable. That is a great point. Dance on my dear.

Andalee, I think these pictures are great. You are showing a nice, classy view of cleavage.

I think some do show too much cleavage when I find myself watching the cleavage and not the dance, wondering when those babies are gonna pop out!

But you don't fit in this category at all.

Originally Posted by SatinWorship19

1. Pfff, people pay good money to get cleavage like that. I probably will, someday! Love your curves. I totally agree that other women identify well with a rounder, softer look. You never look like you're falling out of your costumes, so don't worry about it.

Is your boyfriend a new beau? Or are you relatively new to performing? Even if he approves of your dancing, he might still be wrapping his head around the finer points of performing and costuming - i.e. that people will look at you. It took me awhile to get comfy with my boyfriend photographing girls in lingerie as part of his photography business - even though 90% of them are his lesbian friends.

2. Swimsuit bottoms are a great idea! They're often Lycra, after all, and some are even shimmery. Wish I thought of that! Now I'm off to Target.

Just watch for panty lines - sometimes, the seams on swimwear can be bulky.

We've been dating for almost 2 years, all of which I have been a belly dancer. It's just his personality to be modest. He doesn't even like walking around naked. I was raised with the, "If you got it, flaunt it" worldview and being nekkid was normal.

Originally Posted by HOOKEDNOVICE

I think making women comfortable has less to do with a certain size of appendages and more to do with total package and attitude. You look cute as a button, friendly and fun.

ITA, I think most women can and do appreciate a nice natural rack, as long as they are well-supported (coming from someone who caught herself on video both flapjacking around once and squeezing out the top and sides another time). ,r:;

As long as you are comfortable with them, most others will be. Flaunt away! You really do look gorgeous in that shot. :)

Everybody I know loves boobs! Maybe I just know a bunch of rowdy chicks.

You look great. The cleavage is obviously natural and proportionate to the rest of you. Your overall affect is still cute and sweet.

Personally, I think the blue costume looks better with the additional boobage.

Hi there! First, I think you look great.

I am similarly endowed, and live in a more conservative area.

My troupemates and I have been coming up with several solutions to hide the "casm of doom" when doing family events in the Bible Belt.

1. I sewed three loops inside my bra, one on either side just under where the straps meet the cups, and one in the bridge. Then, I take a long ribbon, scarf, or a strip of fabric that matches my costume and run it through. This creates a band of color that gives me another inch or so of coverage. You can tuck the ends in, or else make extra long ones to twine around the straps and float down your back for the Graeco-Roman look. Your bra really, really has to fit, though, and the fabric shouldn't be bulky, or else it looks sloppy.

2. My teacher, even more endowed than the both of us, uses a net-thing that "holds in the girls". It's like one of those training bras we all wore when we were twelve, only pretty: made of sheer mesh, and it comes up to a high neck. She's even sewn sequins in a sort of necklace pattern. You can wear it separate or sew it to a stomach net.


3. Haven't tried this one yet, but I want to: Get a lace applique for necklines, or any suitable shape and attach it with snaps on the inside, so you've got a little modesty lace peeking through the bra.

4. Our lovely artistic director and costume maven found a stash of beads and sequins that--gasp!--- match my very unusual workhorse bedleh. She's going to make me a dangly thing to attach above the bridge, just so there's more going on there.

The good thing about these is that with the exception of the last one, none are permanent and can be changed out or ditched to coordinate with your costumes.

Originally Posted by catwomyn

You look great. The cleavage is obviously natural and proportionate to the rest of you. Your overall affect is still cute and sweet.

Yeah, I think that's why the cleavage works so well. You have such a classic, sexy-approachable type of beauty, it would be hard to really go "over the top" unless you wore a costume that didn't fit, or maybe one of those odd Eman pastie-style bras.

I really don't think most women would have a problem with a little extra (tastefully decorated & well fit) cleavage- but I totally understand your guy's concern. I really want to be more modest but it is hard 1) because I apparently don't really understand what modesty entails and 2) because all the really pretty cossies are rather low cut. I want to be more modest out of respect for my husband. I thought I was being modest in my latest costume, but apparently I was wrong- he really hates it more than anything I've ever worn- it was a halter style with a neckband- I put mesh over the bust line and used a matching body stocking, which he said made it worse, & I discovered anything made of that lovely holographic foil "makes me look naked" never mind that it's royal blue...
my home made ones generally pass muster with him, but I don't bead & I am drooling over the Egyptian confections. Sigh. I'm not sure I have the patience or the communication skills for a custom order, so if anyone sees a more modest bra, lemme know.

oh, but I think the swim shorts idea is brilliant! I used to get cotton boy shorts but they are increasingly hard to find & ones you *can* find in the lingerie section are ridiculously priced- off to check the swimsuit aisle...

i think you are absolutely positively hot! if i liked girls i would lean towards the curvy ones with big boobs and round butts :)

are you showing too much? i don't personally think so. but i live on an island where we wander around in cleavie tops and boy shorts to get to the water. i love the open practice of showing skin here. if it were a top that showed cleavage, it sure would get my attention. had i still been a b i would have been jealous. but now i would proudly bump tits with you and ask you where you got your top since i'm still struggling to find tops that accentuate the boobs without showing toooo much. hard to find tank tops or summer tops that dont have tiny thin straps. hard to find shirts period. i like that problem tho.

boy shorts are SEXY. victorias secret makes a cotton kind that i love. they are comfy and they show off a bit more cheek than the bikinis i have. love love love them. i think they'd do well under a costume. when i watch dancing with the stars i try to pay attention to the skivvies to see what they do.

Originally Posted by jesennia

i think you are absolutely positively hot! if i liked girls i would lean towards the curvy ones with big boobs and round butts :)

are you showing too much? i don't personally think so. but i live on an island where we wander around in cleavie tops and boy shorts to get to the water. i love the open practice of showing skin here. if it were a top that showed cleavage, it sure would get my attention. had i still been a b i would have been jealous. but now i would proudly bump tits with you and ask you where you got your top since i'm still struggling to find tops that accentuate the boobs without showing toooo much. hard to find tank tops or summer tops that dont have tiny thin straps. hard to find shirts period. i like that problem tho.

boy shorts are SEXY. victorias secret makes a cotton kind that i love. they are comfy and they show off a bit more cheek than the bikinis i have. love love love them. i think they'd do well under a costume. when i watch dancing with the stars i try to pay attention to the skivvies to see what they do.

I buy almost all of my tanks at Old Navy. I like ribbed cotton. BTW, I have noticed the skivvies on DWTS too and they almost always match the costume!

I agree! Your cleavage is great! I am a D cup and don't have a cleavage like that! It isn't too much to me. Your bra fits and there is not spillage over. You know what fits you. I have to put push up in order to get a cleavage that good, and it still isn't that good! If I want modesty I just wear a gypsy top, like in my avatar. Depends on how I am feeling I guess.

As for the boy shorts I wear them under my costumes. They are just so comfortable and don't ride up like the high rise panties would. I also like hipsters, as well. If briefs didn't go so high up the waist I would wear them frequently.

One--as an audience member, I don't worry about watching a dancer with too much cleavage unless it looks like she is on the verge of a wardrobe malfunction. I think folks unconsciously realize this and that is why a lot of people recommend that ample dancers wear more coverage. "More top" generally looks more secure. It isn't that the audience doesn't want to see the grand canyon--they don't want to be distracted during the performance by worrying that they're going to accidentally see something else...or that your milkshake is going to bring all the boys to the yard under your armpit, which really isn't where you want to be showing off your shimmy. If the top fits and gives proper support, I don't think breast size is an issue, though.

Two--swimsuit bottoms do have the potential to be good undergarments, but if they are bikini bottoms and not boy shorts, I would worry about wedgies. Nothing you can't fix with some toupee tape, but definitely worth doing a dress rehearsal before the show.

Honestly, your costume fits you better now. I appreciate your boyfriend's concerns, but your bra fits nicely. It comes up high enough and you WANT cleavage when you're wearing a bedlah. It would look out of place to cover that up while showing your arms, legs, and tummy, which I envy, btw. You're lovely!

Thanks everyone! I really wasn't looking for a confidence booster...but I sure got one today. Thanks. I'll tell my beau to share. ;)

Andalee... even *I* show more than you do... :) tell your boyfriend THAT... if he doesn't believe me, I'll be happy to send picture proof :P lol

Looking great and VERY well covered...:)

I have to agree with everyone else, you aren't showing too much. You are curvy and well proportioned. I think you hit the nail on the head when you said *he* is a very modest person. A lot of guys do get freaked out about revealing clothing/costumes on their wife/girlfriend, they just need to remember that when the audience is admiring your figure, you are going home with them. He should be happy to be with someone can get that sort of positive feedback from the audience.

I'm with the "if you've got it, flaunt it" crowd. You look great. That top is perfect on you. I've seen a lot bigger wear a lot less ;)

I think that's one of the beautiful things about bellydance. Everybody looks different. Therefore the same layered movements look different when executed by different body types. It keeps the dance exciting.

If that were my boyfriend and I looked like that, he'd be proud of me and looking for a 'private dance' when I got home, not trying to get me to cover up. I don't want to think the worst, but it sounds like a little insecurity rearing its ugly head.

Just my two cents.

I think you look great--that bra top does look better with the bigger boobs for sure.

Also, I just had to add that unlike so many who have commented that the husband/boyfriend urges more modesty on stage, my husband is always urging me to show more skin. Yes he wants this for his own visual pleasure but he doesn't seem to feel any jealousy about others seeing it too.

It's me who is shy about it!

Yeah, it's funny - my boyfriend Stacy is a taqsim addict, because he finds my slow movements to be quite sexy. He's always rallying for me to ditch the zill entrance and just skip right to the juicy moves. His reasoning? "The guys will think it's hot!"

He also votes that I show more leg - and I'm the one who posted a whole thread about how I show a lot of leg! I also caught him bumping knuckles with the GOH at my last gig, a radio personality for a hip hop station, after saying "Yup, that's my girlfriend!"

He is a goofball.

Guess I'd rather have an overly excitable, slightly misguided BD boyfriend than one who has a problem with my costuming choices.

Perhaps, there should be a Bhuz equivalent called Boyz - a support group for the "widowed" husbands of belly dancers ..l;,

My husband is another one who has no problem with me showing a little cleavage or leg. At my last student show, some college guys were sitting behind him commenting on how hot I looked, he just turned around, smiled, and said "that's my wife." No insecurities for him!

Originally Posted by catwomyn

Everybody I know loves boobs! Maybe I just know a bunch of rowdy chicks.

Nope, you're right. Here in Maryland we've started the Mammarist Church.

How would a dude know what intimidates women? Has he taken a survey? It might just be him trying to justify his discomfort with it.

I think cleavage is a wonderful thing and whatever you're comfortable with is what counts. I understand respecting your partner but he's gotta respect you and your comfort level.

Boy shorts are awesome underneath costumes. I prefer those from the stripper store or American Apparel, as they have a smoother profile.