Thread: Costume for Performing in Senior Care Facilities

I used to do a lot of dancing for long-term care facilities: independent living apartments, assisted living, and nursing homes. Recently this has picked up again for me. I am having trouble deciding what to wear. On one hand, modesty is usually requested by administration and seems prudent. But I sometimes hear words of disappointment from residents that my costumes for these events are not more revealing. I'm trying to find a middle ground.

The last time I performed at a senior care center I wore an L Rose velvet beladi dress with glittery hip scarf. It's really lovely, and does have a side slit. But I was met with, "THAT'S what you going to DANCE in?" (some of the female residents)..."We were expecting to see some SKIN!" But the activities director said my costume was perfect; she didn't want any of the male residents getting overly excited. I worked in a facility for many years and know first hand what she is talking about.

So I thought of a two-piece with belly covering. But really, doesn't the netting draw the eyes to the abdomen even more than bare skin? Also, professional dresses are so expensive, and I don't want to invest a great deal for these gigs, because I am not that fond of dresses for belly dancing and would not be likely to use it for other gigs.

What have you experienced? Any suggestions?

I've performed in traditional bedlah - - no mesh -- for nursing and retirement homes for years, never had a complaint. I try to keep cleavage to a minimum and often wear a U-top to keep some of the skin covered.

Incidentally, when I saw your thread title I remembered a piece of advice I heard when I was first starting out -- make sure your costume doesn't match your skin color too closely (gold, pale pink) because there have reportedly been incidents of residents with poor eyesight believing they saw a topless dancer!! lol

I never thought of that! Too funny!!

You could go with a colored body stocking instead of a skin-colored one. That gives the effect of a dress--a la Soheir Zaki--but would be inexpensive and still allow you to wear your bedlah separately for other gigs.

Originally Posted by GenevieveOfAtlanta

You could go with a colored body stocking instead of a skin-colored one. That gives the effect of a dress--a la Soheir Zaki--but would be inexpensive and still allow you to wear your bedlah separately for other gigs.

This is true and something that I had not considered. (I'm sure not fond of body stockings, though!)

Originally Posted by GenevieveOfAtlanta

You could go with a colored body stocking instead of a skin-colored one. That gives the effect of a dress--a la Soheir Zaki--but would be inexpensive and still allow you to wear your bedlah separately for other gigs.

Or colored fishnet.

I did volunteer animal assisted therapy in an occupational therapy program at a long term rehabilitation center that specialized in older adults recovering from accidents and serious illness. What I learned was the women want to be pretty, feel good about themselves, and have a little glamour involved with sitting around all day in a wheelchair or pushing a walker. Hence the decorated chairs and walkers and full makeup. Men, however,sometimes tended to lose all social inhibitions and said whatever they felt like, saw younger women as fair game, and generally reverted to adolescent behavior that embarrased the female patients/residents. So I can understand why residents (especially the women) might want to see fringe, bling, some skin and the staff prefer to keep it more sedate.

That is why I think colored fishnet, dyed to match your costume would work well. You could even do something like the tribal gals do with a fishnet body suit that you wear your bra over top of. Bling it up with some glue on sequins and acrylic jewels.

Another possibility would be a sheer tunic that you wear over your bra. Your belt goes on top of it. It can be a simple T shape with boat neckline made of sheer chiffon. Loose and blousy. Lets skin show but always covered. Again, same colors as your costume. That would give you a sort of retro look. Or do a veil wrap with a very sheer veil and either never take it off or only at the finale for a quick spin with veil out.

Genevieve, you really summed it up. Women wanting glamour, men wanting younger women. Why is it that nothing ever changes? :)

I think that I am going to go with the veil wrap. To me, it is more feminine and glamorous than a net, and it would require no further investment from me.

I am an activity director in a long term care setting. Being conservative is key. Therefore, not showing any cleavage and covering up the abdomen is important. Slits in the skirt are fine but not too high (mid-lower thigh is probably ideal).

Yes, residents like bling (and any staff watching too). I annually hire ballroom dancers and the residents are mesmerized by the various costumes the woman wears (full of sequins and very sparkly) and since they perform at other senior facilities, they know the "proper" attire to wear.

I on the other hand, have had Polynesian dancers who in my opinion, have been conservatively dressed, and yet I had some residents complain how "scantily" they were clothed.

Overall, I would probably ask the activity director who you book the gig with how conservative or liberal the population is. Also, most facilities the majority of its residents are female. Some facilities will have no problem with a performer with costuming you would wear at a restaurant or private gig, but others may want more cover-up.

Thanks for the advice. I did not know that you are an activity director!

I had the advice from a dancer not to wear pale pastels such as pink or peach as she had an auld fella shout out " She's in the buff!"

Bright, sparkly, traditional bling and your best dress up..only the best for seniors..that's what I'd want (being a young senior I know what I'm talking about, girls)
When I'm in my armchair with sequins around my walking frame, I shall be hoping for a young Ozgen-look-a-like to perk me up!..g.:

Originally Posted by lizajuk

I had the advice from a dancer not to wear pale pastels such as pink or peach as she had an auld fella shout out " She's in the buff!"

Bright, sparkly, traditional bling and your best dress up..only the best for seniors..that's what I'd want (being a young senior I know what I'm talking about, girls)
When I'm in my armchair with sequins around my walking frame, I shall be hoping for a young Ozgen-look-a-like to perk me up!..g.:

Me, too!!!! ..g.:

Originally Posted by shaia

Thanks for the advice. I did not know that you are an activity director!

Yep...been doing it for many, many, many years.

One place that I dance at regularly wants more skin. Always more skin. Those old men are more dangerous than anyone I've ever seen!

It just depends on the location. I always ask if they want the "traditional belly dancer" look with bare stomach and cleavage or if they want something more modest.

I think bright rich colours are particularly good considering some elderly people's eyesight is no longer strong - but they can enjoy the colours! I had a family friend (dead now) who came to watch me dance once. She was essentially blind but she could see shapes and colours well and enjoyed the music and movement.

WATCH THE FLOORS when you dance in nursing homes. As a nurse I can warn you of many spills, food, utensils, jeez knows what else. Just be careful.

I always used a two piece bedlah with a circle skirt and lots of veils..I went with AMCAB style. Also found that the residents usually enjoyed more classical egyptian music over pop egyptian

Originally Posted by jesennia

WATCH THE FLOORS when you dance in nursing homes. As a nurse I can warn you of many spills, food, utensils, jeez knows what else. Just be careful.

I always used a two piece bedlah with a circle skirt and lots of veils..I went with AMCAB style. Also found that the residents usually enjoyed more classical egyptian music over pop egyptian

Yes, I know about those spills and food on the floors.

I have also found that many seniors love classical Egyptian -- the beautiful orchestration.

I usually wear a nice stretch Saidi dress, or another dress that is somewhat sparkly when I dance for Seniors. It makes me feel more comfortable, because I'm often very close to them.

I really think that this is something I need to keep searching for, as I just don't feel comfortable with my abdomen exposed in this setting.

I wear my regular costumes at all of my senior facility gigs. The residents have always loved them. The women think the costumes are gorgeous, and the men tell me to "shake it, don't break it", among other things that are only funny because they come from 80+ year old men....

And the employees get a kick out of watching the men have such a good time. No one has ever complained about cleavage (and I have a lot of that when I perform...) or skin showing.

The particular facility that I am performing at this week is an orthodox Jewish facility, and the rabbis are always coming and going. Besides the issue with the gentlemen residents, I think that is the main reason the events director requested that I dress conservatively (covered up). It does vary somewhat from place to place.

How about buying a hanan galebeya? They are sparkly and form flattering, but fairly conservative. No midriff on show and if the neckline shows a little much you could wear a nice top underneath. They are cheap too, and would work as a quick costume change in a regular show, if you do saiidi or beledi.

I will check into the Hanan galebeya.

The performance is tomorrow, and I have chosen my L Rose trumpet skirt and wrap top with the belt from my bedlah. No cleavage to speak of, and I don't wear my skirts very low, so it's still pretty conservative. I will get back with a report!

We dance at a local veterans' home twice a year and it's always an adventure. The staff always place the "grabby gentlemen" back away from the dance floor. My favorite moment to date was the man who would applaud like crazy when a song would end but sleep through the actual dances. At the end, he told us that we were a lot better then those "damn cloggers" who performed the weekend before!

(no offense to any cloggers out there....I enjoy all kinds of dance :)))

Today was my performance at the senior center, and it was a blast. A wonderfully receptive audience, lots of audible appreciation. A couple of residents got up to dance with me. I wore my L Rose velvet trumpet skirt and long-sleeved wrap top with a loop belt. This was with the approval of the activities director; afterward, she said that the next time I should cover my abdomen, because her supervisor had commented that I should not dance with it uncovered. I tried a veil wrap, but it really obscured my movements. I just checked out the Hanan beladi dresses, and they are great, but I'm thinking that I may be able to add sequins and appliques to a floor-length body-hugging dress that I already own. I have a full month to work on it! Thanks for all of your comments and suggestions.