Thread: Spin-off: Students, why did you start taking BD?

This is a spin off from the "Students: what do you want/need?" thread.

We've done this before, but I think it's been awhile and we have a whole new crop of Bhuzzers, as well as Bhuz old-timers who might like to chime in.

Sooo . . .

I ask you to think back, possibly 'way back, to when you set foot in your first belly dance class.

Why were you there? Why did you sign up for that BD class?

To answer properly, you have to "forget" everything you already know about BD, as well as what you might have liked to have known (looking back) as a newbie, and remember yourself before BD; you know, BBD (kinda like BCE, Before the Common Era).

1) to add variety to your fitness routine, or to start one?

2) to make your friend happy because she didn't want to go by herself?

3) to assuage your curiosity about BD or the ME in general?

4) to meet new people/to socialize/to have an evening out?

5) to perform?

6) to become a "professional" dancer?

7) to round out your dance education? (had experience in other dance forms)

8) to express yourself/to express your creativity?

9) to dress up?

10) because you saw a dancer and had your socks knocked off and just had to experience it for yourself?

11) just to try something new/piqued your interest?

12) to add glamour/exotica to your life?

13) other - please specify!

Remember, the responses are to what you were feeling/thinking at the time you signed up for your first BD class, not why you continued after it.

This whole question is something I've been studying (if you will) for quite some time. I've been asking this same question of my new students for many years, but this time I'm going to ask it of them in writing, anonymously.

Thanks so much, everybody! I look forward to the results!

Deborah

Well, it was ten years ago for me, and what happened was, my best friend, her other best friend and I had all returned home within a year of each other from various places overseas, and we had very differently demanding lifestyles and wanted to do something fun together. We were in our early 30s and feeling a bit flabby. The other two women both had long-standing interests in the ME/That General Region because my best friend had recently left her Afghan husband and her other best friend had recently left her Turkish husband - and she'd lived in Istanbul for many years.

My best friend rang me one day and asked if I wanted to go to a belly dancing show that was on in town. "And," she said, "there are going to be lessons starting after it - do you want to go?" I said yes why not, and it took off from there.

I'd had a go at BD when I was a lot younger, very briefly, and didn't really get into it but I do remember noticing how all the (much older) women seemed so confident in their bodies when they put their sequinned outfits on. If I'd been more driven I probably would have invented some kind of gothy fusion, because I liked the idea of BD but was far too kewl and serious-business-artsy-fartsy at the time. Fortunately, however, I was too busy and too depressed.

So I went to this show and loved it, and once again thought how lovely it was that every single dancer looked gorgeous whether she was fat or thin or somewhere in between. And I loved the costumes! Between that show and the lessons starting I broke up with my boyfriend, so I was feeling a bit sad and in need of something new and positive. I can't remember exactly what I thought BD was at the time, other than that it was somewhere "eastern" and that you showed your belly when you did it even if you were fat.

Oh, Deborah, what a great question to revisit!

My answer is totally embarrassing, but I'll share because I think I represented so many beginners.

I had been to a BD show or two with my mom (who's a fan of the dance, but not a dancer). I really didn't 'get it.' I remember being bored and not understanding why all the dancers weren't gorgeous sexy exotic creatures. Looked like housewives playing dressup to me.

Then my mom (pusher!) bought me a How to Bellydance video. (Janine Rabbit). I was in my mid-30's and starting to get a little fleshy, I needed to exercise, so I did it. I found the moves very...sexy. In fact, I even made a costume and danced for my man once. I also felt attracted to the music and the moves on some other level -- a very Orientalist level, I think. Some imaginary exotic daydream of some nameless place full of spices and jewels and princesses, right?

(i am so embarrassed right now)

Then my mom took me to another show -- a Dahlia Carella workshop show, I think. This time, I was secretly imagining myself on that stage. This time, I could appreciate the dancing more. I watched all the dancers, picked out the troupe I thought I'd want to take classes from.

Before I signed up for the class I chose, I went to see the teacher dance at a restaurant. That's when I was truly hooked. I hadn't seen much professional dancing before that, and I loved the vibe at the restaurant.

When I started my classes, I was already (secretly) thinking I'd like to dance professionally someday. But I told everyone, including my teacher and my family, that I just wanted some exercise and time for myself.

Time for myself was a huge thing at that time. I was working anywhere from 40 to 120 hours a week running a business, and had two kids. It was brutal. Bellydance saved me from totally losing myself as a person.

And, of course, I did eventually dance on that workshop show stage and, later, in that restaurant!

Thanks so much, Zum and Lauren!

Lauren, I don't think you need to be embarrassed about why you started BDing . . . getting to the Truth, no matter how shameful (), is precisely why I asked the question!

My mom, like Zum's friends, had a general interest in the ME region also, although it was more like Lauren's "orientalist" sentiments, "some imaginary exotic daydream of some nameless place full of spices and jewels and princesses," or, as mom has voiced it, "bible times." This was in the 1940's and it was the late 1960's before she (in her later 30's) ever did anything about it.

Although she wasn't harboring it as a secret, my mom, like Lauren, purposely took up BD to become a pro dancer and, she soon discovered, a teacher.

Deborah

Great questions! There are a number of factors that brought me to sign up for my first bellydance class.

1. I saw bellydancers performing at a science fiction convention. Seeing normal "everyday" people (not the glamorous Barbie-bodied types I'd always thought would be the ones to do bellydancing) dancing and having fun made it look very appealing to me.

2. My friend and I had decided to replace our corset-y and big-skirted Ren Faire garb with more comfortable gypsy garb. I sewed vests and harem pants for us, and as I was making them, I really started to wish that I knew how to dance in them!

3. My best friend fell hard and fast for her new boyfriend. I was used to seeing her at least once or twice a week, but after the boy came along, I only saw her a few times a month. I needed something to fill the time that I was used to spending with her, and fill my need for girl-bonding. Plus, I knew that once things calmed down, she'd want to do bellydancing, too. (Which she now does, so it's something we can do together.)

4. I needed to move my body. I've always been thin, but I've never been in shape. I've always hated all forms of exercise--running, sports, yoga, etc. HATE HATE HATE. But I was always one of the last people to get off the dance floor at school dancers, sorority formals, etc., so it seemed logical that if I took a dance class, I'd "forget" that I was exercising.

My hubby thought it would be something fun for me. He pretty much signed me up.

I was figure skating at the time and I think he wanted to watch me participate in something warmer.

Little did he know what he started...l;,

my schedule started to be more difficult to incorporate figure skating into it (had to take the train, the rink schedules weren't easy, plus the rink wasn't easily offering classes for higher levels and i was starting to get bored...)
but i needed to stay active. always hated sports that just involved running around or whatnot. love dances, it's physical, technical, and lets you explore the creative aspect too :) all good!
i've always loved traveling, discovering other cultures.
when BD classes started being offered around here, at a price decent enough for students to afford, it just seemed so logical and so natural to sign up. i don't think i ever really thought about, it just seemed like an obvious thing to do ^^

Deep down, I always believed I was Middle Eastern. Really. Except I'm not.

I danced salsa and folk music with friends when I was young. We had a little group of completely untrained teenagers, and I was constantly told that I had the most rhythm. Ha, ha. I just could stay focused for longer periods of time.

I saw a bellydancer in Epcot when I was eighteen or nineteen. Totally fell in love. I always wanted to take up ballet but most ballet classes were geared for small children. I was a little too old for that. Fast forward another seven years (life happens) and I think I was browsing adult dance studios (latin, ballroom, etc) when I found my teacher's bellydance site. It totally called to me. You could see the ballet influence in her videos and photos, so I emailed her and she said, "Come on down next week. We're starting new classes," and that's it. I didn't do it for fitness or fun or to socialize though I think those are all legit reasons.

I did it because I really, really love to dance. The music's in my head.

I used to live in India and while I wasn't exposed to bellydance per se, I was exposed to different cultures and art forms!

Then I went on two student trips to Turkey. Discovered Tarkan, saw all the costumes but never imagined buying any - too fat, I told myself.

Picked up the Bellytwins Bellydance for Fitness series because it looked like a fun way to exercise as opposed to...everything else. Plus, they also had an Indian background. I had also seen my teacher's website but was too chicken to sign up. After a year of videos, I attended the annual student recital and *finally* decided to sign up for class!

I still think the Bellytwins helped a little. Except for the wristflips. I do those waaay too much.

I started with Bellytwins videos, too. Had no intentions (but a secret wish) of ever performing in front of people. I picked up their videos because 1)I hoped it would help with my hip pain, which it did 2) I have to really enjoy exercising to keep it up (I could be reading or writing instead) 3) my heart was a little tender and I needed something to make me feel pretty and graceful instead of clumsy 4) I've had an interest in Egypt and Egyptian-related things since elementary school.

Anyway, I outgrew my videos and about that time a teacher came to my area. I learned a lot in the class, realized I was a decent choreographer, and the instructor invited me to come dance with she and a couple of other women that were at a more advanced level than the classes so we could help each other progress and just to have fun.

I don't think I ever thought about it really hard. I think it went something like this:

Friend: So the SCA is having belly dance classes...wanna go?

Me: Okay.

lol Which is so funny considering how I am now. The first time I knew I had to learn more was when I went to Border Raids (an SCA event). I think I'd been learning for about a month. There was this girl there who had rugs laid out and music playing. We walked up to their camp and just watched for a minute. She invited us into camp and continued dancing. It was so amazing. It was like she just floated across those carpets. I was so enthralled...then she asked us to get up and dance with her. lol I can't even imagine what I looked like after only a month of classes even though I picked up on it pretty quickly. Since then, I've been hooked.

So I have two answers to this question. Being blonde and not looking Greek, which I am, people are often curious how I found myself dancing in restaurants.

For customers, I always say it was a bit of a lark when I moved to a new town and wanted to meet people and I fell in love almost instantly. And the music spoke to me on a level that I think might be genetic.

For people who know me better, I tell them that part but I also add that the reason I took belly dance instead of an other step aerobics class is that I had recently split with my boyfriend who was terribly conscious of appearances and had always been embarrassed by me and I knew that he would hate it. Which he did when he found out but honestly by that time I didn't care as I had made so many friends and really begun to love this art form.

In a way I have to thank him for being the uptight you-know-what that he was whenever it came to something I was interested in. I might never have tried belly dancing if I hadn't been rebelling against his influence.

Side note: I'm now with a wonderful man who comes to see me dance almost weekly, is my shill at the restaurant and is incredibly encouraging. Our first date was at a student show I did on his birthday in 2007. Happy Birthday baby, I got you a whole community of people to be involved with ;).

For me, I've always took dance classes from being 5 years old - ballet, tap, ballroom, latin, disco etc etc. When I moved away from home I gave up ballet and was really missing dancing. I got very fat and very fed up and joined a slimming club and a women only gym. The gym did 10 week courses of different dance styles, I started tap and jazz, tried african (I was terrible at it) and then noticed belly dancing and thought I'd tried everything else I might as well give that a go as well. Must thank my first teacher 'cos she got me totally hooked and that was 9 years ago!

An aside which links to other threads - I would never have found this dance or gone to a class that was not in a women only space - I felt safe there. I mention it here 'cos it's relevant to why I started dancing, because it was an activity I could do in a place I felt emotionally safe. I was and still am overweight and at that time was pre-operation on a bust reduction, I'm still an E cup so that will tell you how big I was! It will also tell you why I always dropped other dance forms - I was never going to be the right body type to go anywhere with it, some how at belly dance class age/body type didn't seem to matter.

When I was about 4 I saw Neijla Ates dance in some cheesy old film and I was utterly fascinated at the time. The images stayed with me over the years in a nebulous way.

I am fairly musical and come from a fairly musical family. I always wanted to dance to music but was steered down the path of learning an instrument instead.

My first teacher started a class at the university while I was in my final year. My best friend was dying to go and try it but wouldn't go by herself. She persuaded me to go and I went thinking that it would be awful because I have 2 left feet but I figured that I would only need to go to a couple of lessons and then she would be settled and I wouldn't 'need' to attend.

Well, I do have 2 left feet but as soon as I got there my long-standing desire to learn to dance asserted itself. I was captivated by the teacher's demonstration and I loved the way I felt afterwards - so much more aware of my body.

My friend gave up after a couple of years but I have only stopped since then for serious injury (broken leg) and serious illness.

I was in graduate school and wanted to do something to have fun and relieve stress. I fell in love on my first day and felt I had found my soul. Thank you Kathy (my first teacher) for that wonderful experience.

I went with a friend who didn't want to go on her own.

Originally Posted by Candi

I went with a friend who didn't want to go on her own.

I would love to do a survey on how many times that has happened! One of our troupe members experienced that!

I started nearly 11 years ago.
I wanted to do a dance that didn't mean I needed a partner. MY husband and I very nearly entered the divorce courts after trying to learn ballroom togther. He progressed down the staircase to the studio in the middle of the Dashing White Sergeant and left me stranded.He of course prefered hammering me on then squash and tennis court! So what couldn't he do...yeh dance so where can I dance?
So Flamenco was what I was looking for but I found Kharis and yes ..yes no men..sorry guys but like Caroline T I was looking for that..in my case being a single woman was quite suficient and I would only have to worry what women thought of me ( which I admit is pretty scary)
One lesson listening to Egyptian music (what there was of it then courtesy of Hossam)and watchingsparkly jingly women I was hooked.
Oh how times change here am I (when I have not just been kicked out of an A&E dept with black and blue veins in my hands) teaching in jazz pants and there's nothing I can do ( nor would I want to guys!!!!!!!!!!) to stop a guy joining in my classes.Just don't come with the wife and get all domestic on me!..g.:

I've always been a fan of the old, melodramatic movies and the screen queens of that era. (My very favorite movie is The Ten Commandments.) Movies like that called to me and I've always longed for glamour, lushness, beauty, sexiness and a hint of the exotic. I don't know how I made the leap from that to bellydance in my mind, however, it does fit the bill, doesn't it? I think it's something to do with the "dancing girls" in many of those old movies.

Anyway, after going back to work from maternity leave, I was looking for something that would help me burn off some baby weight and that would help me feel present in my body again and give me the ability to do something just for me - I didn't want to lose myself in being mommy. When I went down to my job's fitness center, I saw that they were starting a bellydance class, so I decided to sign up.

After my first session, the teacher pulled me aside and said that she noticed real talent in me and she wanted me to join her "real" class, which was held in a community center. So I started those classes and got hooked. I haven't looked back since ... it's been over five years now. I am so glad to have found my heart's desire.

I started classes 9 years ago, but I have fantasized about being a bellydancer since I was a kid in the 70s-80s.

I had a child at a fairly young age so most of my youth was spent being a mom... and then a single mom... and then a single mom with a very demanding job. Eventually I ended up moving to a new area and was looking for something to do/friends. I came across an ad for a class and knew it was finally time. My SO offered to babysit for me. I have been obsessed ever since.

I always credit bellydance with saving my sanity. :)

I saw the class in our Rec Dept catalogue and realized I had always wanted to try it. I also knew my hubby would be totally supportive.
I needed a new way to excersize and it looked fun. Who knew I had set sail on such an adventure!

What a wonderful question!!!
My first encounter with belly dance: i was an artistic roller skater (can you say early 90's .w.:) we hired a belly dancer for my coach's b-day and i remember telling my boyfriend "i would NEVER do that" (i was 13 and probably jealous that i couldn't move that way :)
Fast forward 3 years later: they fired my coach and i was heartbroken ..cr.: i started browsing through the phone book one day and came across belly dancing instruction. i remember being really really really scared to ask my dad if i could take lessons because i was afraid he'd 1. say no 2. say no because he thought it would be to "grown-up" for me.
Luckily, he said yes and i was hooked after taking my first class. and it really was the start of an obsession and life-long passion.

Originally Posted by lizajuk

I wanted to do a dance that didn't mean I needed a partner.

That was one of the really big draws for me. I'd danced socially all my life, loved to dance and was married to someone who would only dance when he'd had "enough" to drink (which meant any woman in her right mind wouldn't want to dance with him). My love of belly dance has long long outlived that marriage.

However, I also went to my first class with a friend who was the one who really wanted to do belly dancing. We danced together for about 5 years, and then she dropped it for other things -- I continued for another almost 30 yrs now! LOL

And Lauren, I too was very drawn by the fantasy romance mythology. :egy:

Whatever gets you there -- the common thread I see is that once at that first class, most of us never really looked back.

What a fun thread!!!

Lauren, since you already broke the ice with your post, I will add mine. I wasn't going to admit but I too loved what little I knew of cultural things, exotic, romantic fabirics, veils, mysterious, etc..l;,..l;, and I a have ALWAYS liked the music.

Second, I have always liked to dress up in veils, chiffon skirts, etc. since childhood (I was always someone from Egypt when we played dress up) but where could I do that as and adult?

We had classes offered in my small town but I had a baby at home and the time just didn't work w/ my schedule. Fast forward a few years and the minute my son hit kindergarten I opend the phone book. Took my first introductory workshop and absolutely fell in love!!

I still feel that way, maybe because I am new still, but I remain hooked on the hip scarves, the movements, and music.

Now that I am learning so much more I can love BD on an even deeper level. I have just scratced the surface! The different beats, the zils (love/hate relationship) the different styles of the dance...I literally live for my Thursday night classes. any spare moment I have is spent Bhuzzing or practicing to whatever current dvd I have. Though I don't have any aspirations more than just dancing, I am satisfied with being the best I can at it.

I have to answer #1, as I was post-baby and plus 50 lbs when I saw a listing for BD in my local Parks & Rec book and mentioned to hubby how fun that would be but acknowledged that Christmas was no time to be throwing money around.

Dear sweet Hubby took note and went on his own and signed me up for two classes/week and put the receipt in my stocking.

That local Parks & Rec teacher was none other than the fabulous Zahra Zuhair!!

i was a life guead and worked at a gym so I was always working out or swimming doing something active but not feminine .I had two boys and was in shape but felt i had lost my feminiity. so I had a friend from high school that was majoring in dance and child care. My husbands cousin actually belly danced at my weeding 6 years eailer. i thought that was femimine and so i looked in the yellow pages found a class and had my friend go with me. My first teacher was a house dancer at a popular returant and every sat she has her students take turms dancing with her . i got the bug and soon loved performing .belly dance has become my passion and job.i love teaching as well. i used to teach swim lessons now i teach dance.

Originally Posted by HOOKEDNOVICE

What a fun thread!!!

Lauren, since you already broke the ice with your post, I will add mine. I wasn't going to admit but I too loved what little I knew of cultural things, exotic, romantic fabirics, veils, mysterious, etc..l;,..l;, and I a have ALWAYS liked the music.

Thanks for standing over here in the Big Orientalist Dork corner with me!!! I also remember wrapping my mom's silk scarves around my head/face, and putting her rhinestone necklaces on my forehead as a little girl.


I wonder how many of those who say 'I saw a class and I always wanted to try it' or 'I fell in love with it when I saw a dancer' actually fell in love with the exotic sexiness first and the expressiveness/musicality later? Must be a few of you? Please?

As a teacher, I try to remember that many of my students are coming in with that 'feeling' and can be gently guided and rehabilitated, as HookedNovice and I were, to appreciate the *real* cultural context and the *real* artistry of the dance over time.

aI have always loved to dance though I never took a formal dance class. My family all love to dance. Merengue, salsa, pop, whatever. If there is any kind of party they dance.

I remember seeing a belly dancer in a movie once when I was a kid and got intrigued. But never thought of actually learning it.

Way back when in my freshman yr. of college, A senior taught a bd class. I took it then, fell in love with it, then she dropped out of school. I got on the dance team in college and fulfilled my love of dance that way instead. After college, always wanted to get back into it, but didn't know of any classes. Fast forward 5 yrs later. One day, my friend asked if I would take a yoga class with her and I went and saw a
a flyer about BD classes at the yoga studio.

I took it then as a form of exercise with no thought of ever performing. After a while I was in the more advance (beyond beginner) class which had a hard time filling up so it was sporadic. I would do the class for 2 months then stop for 3 months. Then by chance I got a newspaper (which I never do) and was browsing through it when I saw this tiny 1.5" ad and low and behold there was a bd school 5 minutes from where I lived.

That one time I got the newspaper changed my life! I now have group of friends that I wouldn't have had otherwise. This school also encouraged me to perform. So now I have performed at several restaurants, a prom and a wedding. I travel a lot for my day job and I will work my travel around my class. LOL.

To answer Lauren's question, I was always in Tae Kwon Do, so I never felt girly. Not a lot of girls took that when I was in it (late 80's early 90's) so I was always around the guys. I was just one of the guys. I think that was why I was intrigued with belly dancing. It made me feel girly, a little sexy while dancing my butt off.

Originally Posted by Lauren_

I wonder how many of those who say 'I saw a class and I always wanted to try it' or 'I fell in love with it when I saw a dancer' actually fell in love with the exotic sexiness first and the expressiveness/musicality later? Must be a few of you? Please?

Me! As I noted in my answer, I was all about glamour, drama, sexiness, and exoticism. I knew nothing about musicality or the true art behind the dance until I'd immersed myself in it. And still, five+ years later, I'm partly into it because of glamour, drama, sexiness and exoticism! So, sue me! Bellydance appeals to my inner drama queen and I think that's okay!

In 1980, after training in ballet for some years and dancing on pointe, I had a growth spurt. I ended up really tall and with, erm, generous curves. Ballet really didn't fit my body any more (5'10" and 38-21-37), and I didn't know what to do. We moved to a sparsely populated state with very long, cold, dark winters and among the many things we found to fill the time until spring, there were bellydance classes at the YMCA right around the corner from our house. I wasn't allowed to attend alone as I was under 18, so my Mom went with me and I really enjoyed it and had an aptitude for it. Mom wasn't so enamored, so once I proved myself in class they let me attend without her.