Thread: Update: I did it! Your first time

Check out my last post for an update! ..g.:

Any advice or stories of your first time? Dancing in a bar, that is.

First some background. Our troupe has been together for just over a year and we are finally getting more shows and recognition. We've performed at a Renaissance Faire, haflas, belly dance shows, etc as a troupe - all choregraphed dances.

For the past several months, we've been trying to get a gig going at a local bar. It has finally been scheduled for March 28. We are doing 2, 30 minute shows with a 1/2 hour break in between. I was so excited to do this - although it does make me nervous - we've never done anything like this before. Then last night at rehearsal, our instructor had us sign up for the upcoming shows (we have 3 stage performances next month). Everyone bailed on the bar gig! Some had other committments and some just don't want to dance at a bar (or their husbands don't want them to). My instructor and I are the only ones committed to it.

I did a duet at the Renaissance Faire that I helped choreograph with my partner but I've never solo'd or done any freestyle (only choregraphy). So now in less than 2 weeks, I have to learn to do both so my instructor & I can do this bar gig alone! Help!!!!

My husband says I'll do fine if I just relax and enjoy it but that's easier said then done. I'm a typical type A personality so it's hard for me to just "go with the flow". Please, Please tell me I'll do alright! I am totally freaked out by this! ..cr.:.w.: (can you tell I'm freaking out - I can't even decide on the right expression)

First, what kind of bar is it? Is it a middle eastern club? I ask because what I'd tell you to expect would be different depending on the kind of bar.

My advice is just put music on and let yourself bop around the house. My new mantra is that you'll never be able to do anything you're not willing to do badly at first....in this case, you want to get the 'badly' over with at home! So spend as much time as possible playing your music and dancing. It's going to be very important to look at your audience, interact with them, have fun be playful... so have some imaginary people in the room to joke and play with while you dance.

The bar is just a local hang-out (complete with jukebox and pool tables), not ME. In fact, the main clientele are local farmers so not your typical audience. It's a really small place but it's also the local hangout for the biker crowd.

If this first time goes well, we are hoping to make it into a regular monthly gig. They have a great patio area complete with a stage that we are dying to dance on this summer.

Eddies?

Oh, my. I used to work in places like that as a bartender. I have to say, I can't imagine bellydancing in one. And your very first time improvising is going to be there?

Honestly, other than practice to your music a ridiculous LOT, I don't know what advice to give you.

If I were the teacher in this situation, I'd dance at the place by myself first, or with another pro, to get a feel for how it's going to go over. I'd invite my students to come watch the first or second time, THEN I'd see if any of them want to come dance with me there. But I don't think I'd make it anyone's first improv experience.

I'm sure you'll be fine, the worst that could happen would be that the bar patrons will misunderstand and make some inappropriate comments, or you'll freeze up and do the same move for three minutes -- those things happen, and the world doesn't end.

But I also think you'd be within your rights to say to your teacher 'hey, I'm having second thoughts about this, I'm just not sure about my first improv experience being in an untested environment... can I just come and help you with your costume and music and be your support person this first time?'

If it's Eddies...you will be Ok

Originally Posted by anala

Eddies?

Nope - Blue Moon out in Radium Springs.

Lauren - thanks for the advice. I don't want to bail on my instructor too. We've worked too hard to get this set up so I wouldn't feel right about backing out. I'll suck it up and do it. I'm thinking of asking her to jump in though if it looks like I'm making a fool of myself or freezing.

She did mention that she might ask a couple of other local dancers to join us. That would be a big relief as it would take some of the pressure off me. (And make us look better since we'd have more dancers).

Go have a beer there first. That will help. Not on the night you are dancing...
;-)

Originally Posted by anala

Go have a beer there first. That will help. Not on the night you are dancing...
;-)

Aah, come on. I might need a shot that night! No, just kidding. I know better than that - it makes spinning really hard. But afterwards!!!

Sarah and I have been out there a few times while trying to set it up so I'm familiar with the layout. That helps.

You will be fine. It's just a bar. Try to have a good time;)

I've found bikers to be really fun audiences. But, yeah, go to the bar a night you're not drinking so you have a gander at the crowd. It's more important to look confident than dance like you are dancing for a BDSS crowd. And then you'll look like you're having fun. People love that.

Or you could just look like you could kick their a$$! For some reason, at the dive/bar club we used to dance at in SF, one of the regulars told us that we terrified them when we walked in. And they loved that. ..l;, I guess it was all the jewelry and the coin bras. And let me tell you, we are not scary looking gals. (It would be me, Jill Parker, Rachel Brice, Rose Harden and a couple of others, none of us very imposing). Anyhoo, the costume made us feel "armored", so it's easier to act the part of being in control, if that made sense.

Remember, this will not be a critical to your dancing crowd, so you'll have fun, really! Oh and PS, we'd always have 1/2 a drink before performing, just don't forget to eat a little something.

Originally Posted by jetgirl

I've found bikers to be really fun audiences.

My best friend is the president of the bike club so I know a few of the bikers and you're right - they are fun. I'm hoping my friend and his wife will come so I have a friendly face in the audience.

Originally Posted by jetgirl

Or you could just look like you could kick their a$$! For some reason, at the dive/bar club we used to dance at in SF, one of the regulars told us that we terrified them when we walked in. And they loved that. ..l;, I guess it was all the jewelry and the coin bras. And let me tell you, we are not scary looking gals. (It would be me, Jill Parker, Rachel Brice, Rose Harden and a couple of others, none of us very imposing). Anyhoo, the costume made us feel "armored", so it's easier to act the part of being in control, if that made sense.

I understand completely - Jennivere can usually do things Jennifer wouldn't dare do. What is it with putting on a costume that makes us so empowered/confident? Maybe that's why I'm freaking right now - I don't have my "wonder woman" costume on. LOL.

I suppose it will all be alright. I just need reassuring. Anyone got any funny/inspiring stories to tell of your first time? I'd love to hear them.

Jill Parker, Rachel Brice, Rose Harden and a couple of others, none of us very imposing

No..no..not an intimidating group at all!!

i always think the gigs with alcohol involved are easier, the audience is a bit looser (hopefully not to loose). you can play more with them.
we sometimes dance infront of audiences that are so stone faced, makes you think you bother them.
you will be ok, good luck sending you good vibes from alamogordo.

Good point Georgine. I hadn't thought about that.

I used to be a waitress at biker bar (many years ago) so hopefully some of that experience will come in handy here.

Originally Posted by anala

Jill Parker, Rachel Brice, Rose Harden and a couple of others, none of us very imposing

No..no..not an intimidating group at all!!

..l;,..l;,

Ok, I can't believe no one has any "first time" stories to tell!

My advice would be to pick something that you're really good at and focus your first piece on that. (Ooey-gooey undulations and omis? Veil or finger cymbals? Powerhouse shimmies?) You'll ease into the show with something you know looks good, and it will help you relax for the rest of the night. Also remember that if it's not a crowd that has seen a lot of bellydance before, you can be quite repetitive because it's new to them. Use a whole song on your main strengths.

Good luck!

Thanks Anuka. That's good advice. I'm hoping to pick out my music today/tomorrow and start practicing. I asked my instructor for advice last night on music and she suggested something moderately fast. Bummer - I was hoping for slow because it gives me more time to think but I guess I can do a fast one too. Now just to decide which one.

Slow...biker bar...dont! Now is not the time for high art...

I'll echo Lauren's oh my.

Improv skills and solo performance take time to develop and pull off with confidence just like anything else. I wouldn't (didn't) choose to place myself in this kind of situation but that is just me. I also would not place my students in this kind of situation, but again, just my opinion.

Please understand, Jennivere, that we have threads all the time about people going pro too soon, about people needing to achieve a certain level of professionalism before they present our art to the general public, etc.

We want to be supportive without being hyppocrites to our own principles. Ideally, you'd be performing improv at haflas and other student venues for a long time and be completely comfortable with it before you'd be doing it in a general public environment.

Obviously, that's not going to happen so I want to be supportive of you. And I'm sure you'll do just fine and they'll love you. I think fast music is a great idea, keep it lively. Audiences have a tendency to just stare during slow pieces, even if they love it. It stops the flow of energy and leaves you worried and self-conscious. (I learned that the hard way!!). During fast pieces, they'll clap along and maybe eve whoop and holler a bit, which will boost your confidence and feed your energy.

Practice lots, make your friends family and neighbors come and watch you so you get used to being watched while you improv, and making eye contact and smiling while you're dancing 'on the spot.'

Be prepared for not being able to hear your music over the crowd if the place is full/lively. (just smile and keep moving...)

It's unlikely that anyone will do anything inappropriate, but it's a good idea to be prepared for anything in any environment where there's alcohol. Bad things are rare, but they do happen. Usually a bartender and/or regular patrons will quickly check any bad behavior, but if anyone tries to touch you or grabs at your costume, stop dancing immediately and walk out. (this happened to a dancer I know over mardigras weekend, and she was so unprepared she didn't know what to do at the time. In hindsight, I think leaving the environment and refusing to dance unless things like that stopped immediately would have been wise). Not trying to scare you at all, I don't think anything like that will happen -- but being prepared for the worst allows you to enjoy the best.

I hope you have a really great time and everything goes well. Be sure to update us after the gig!

Originally Posted by Lauren_

Please understand, Jennivere, that we have threads all the time about people going pro too soon, about people needing to achieve a certain level of professionalism before they present our art to the general public, etc.

We want to be supportive without being hyppocrites to our own principles. Ideally, you'd be performing improv at haflas and other student venues for a long time and be completely comfortable with it before you'd be doing it in a general public environment.

Obviously, that's not going to happen so I want to be supportive of you. And I'm sure you'll do just fine and they'll love you. I think fast music is a great idea, keep it lively. Audiences have a tendency to just stare during slow pieces, even if they love it. It stops the flow of energy and leaves you worried and self-conscious. (I learned that the hard way!!). During fast pieces, they'll clap along and maybe eve whoop and holler a bit, which will boost your confidence and feed your energy.

I hope you have a really great time and everything goes well. Be sure to update us after the gig!

Thanks Lauren. I definately understand and am not in the least bit offended. I know you are all just looking out for what's best for us newbies and for the dance. Believe me - this is not my ideal first solo environment either but I feel obligated to at least try. We worked too hard to get this set up. I can't just back out because I'm scared. Besides, being a Type A Capricorn, the pressure is good for me - it will make me try even harder - you know us Capricorns have to be perfect. And I don't feel totally incapable. We've danced at quite a few staged shows in the past year and even got to perform for a ballroom full of guests at a hotel on New Year's Eve. This just feels different because a) it's a bar and b) it's my first time solo'ing. At least it is a small bar so it won't be too overly crowded. And I've worked as a waitress in bars before so I think I can handle just about anything that comes my way. I figure if I can dodge pool cues and grabbing hands while balancing a tray full of drinks over my head, I should be able to handle a few hip bumps and undulations.

I'm getting with my instructor this weekend to pick music and discuss our line-up. I'll keep you all posted. Thanks again everyone for all the support and advice.

Originally Posted by anala

Slow...biker bar...dont! Now is not the time for high art...

Good point! Hadn't thought about it from that perspective.

I will jump in with a first time experience, and NO I was certainly not ready to do it! I got the gig from another dancer in my troupe (that I was in at the time) who did pro gigs, she could not do it and passed it on to me. I thought, OK she thinks I can so maybe I can?!
I have to say that on the way there, my husband drove me because I was so nervous.... I started flipping out! I kept thinking "I'm NOT a belly dancer, they think that is what they are getting, I am a big sham! Oh MY GOD what have I done?" My husband asked what I was doing as I was making funny noises thinking this and breathing hard. (You asked!). He said something that made me laugh, he always does, he said "You could stand on your head a squawk like a chicken and they would think it is part of the show, this is not a ME audience!" (OK he knew I was better than that!..l;,). I really calmed down! I started thinking that I would perform a classy piece and show them how beautiful ME dance could be AND how fun it could be! And no I did not explore my art, just was fun and friendly. I went in and danced and had a blast! I had nothing but good reports about it. My point is that most people flip more planning than dancing!
One more thing....
I have danced at "biker" birthday parties, I have to say that they are far more respectful than some of the more "upscale" clients I have had for belly grams. Maybe it's the sword?
I did one this past summer, when we pulled up to the party there were no less than 20 Bikes parked on the lawn. It was a fun party! Everyone was very respectful and very nice! I think you get the respect you expect most times! So don't judge a book by it's cover! (I did one "upscale" party filled with awful comments the whole time but none from the bikers, go figure)
Have a good time! Every dancer has to cut her teeth someplace! Your instructor has confidence in you so have it in yourself!

Thanks Faaria. I think you are right - I'm more nervous thinking about it than the idea of just doing it.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who freaks before a show.

I think I'm more afraid I'll forget to move than I am about what people will think. I actually sat down and wrote out all the moves I know - it was a lot more than I thought. So how come when I try to freestyle I can only think of 2 or 3?

I think you're going to have a great time. I mean, as it's been said before, the crowd sounds like the type that doesn't know a lot about bellydance.

My advice is to show up, be beautiful and mysterious, confident and proud, and rock that stage!

Your instructor should be sympathetic (i should hope) to the fact that you haven't danced in such a venue before - if you get stuck, look to her. She should be able to lend you a bit of confidence.

And tell us about how it goes!

can only think of 2 or 3?

2 or 3 are plenty, when done with variety and feeling! Way better than scribbeling all over the place. Trust me!

Originally Posted by Psyche

IMy advice is to show up, be beautiful and mysterious, confident and proud, and rock that stage!

I like the image that puts in my mind. But...I haven't even thought about what I'm going to wear. Oh, God - another thing to stress about!

Guess I've got a lot to do this weekend - pick music, practice, practice, practice, and pick something to wear.

Originally Posted by JennivereMarjeta

Thanks Lauren. I definately understand and am not in the least bit offended.

oh, thank goodness *breathes again* I was really stewing over how to be supportive of you as a person without beraying ideals. I appreciate that you can see whole picture and didn't take that personally.

There are still nights I'm CERTAIN I do the same three or four moves over and over -- yet audiences seem to really enjoy the show. Hossam Ramzy said once that Fifi only knows about 4 moves, but she does them perfectly TO THE MUSIC. I think knowing and loving your music are key. This kind of gig is all entertainment and personality anyway. No one's going to judge your dancing. If you smile, make eye contact, and have a fun, playful attitude, they'll LOVE you.