Thread: Seeking critique for new youtube video (mine) and showing off my girls! :)

I finally got a performance of mine recorded and since I don't have anything usable on youtube decided to post it. It's an entirely improvised performance (with some minor sound issues at the beginning, hence the slightly delayed start in the music) and I would appreciate any helpful critique as I'm always looking to improve. The costume is definitely too short - it will be on the swap meet once I get measurements and a new dress has been ordered from the same seamstress that made my girls' costumes. :)

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkBPrXjaxzw]YouTube - April 2009 Improvised Performance by Mary[/ame]

My choreography class was also at the same show and this is a video of their performance. We've got a few things to work on, but they work hard and I'm proud of them. :)

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HVwf8dis7pc]YouTube - Choreography Class Performing April 2009[/ame]

Wow, I really enjoyed your improv performance! Your dancing is just lovely. Very good technique, and I love that you have such a relaxed pace - it suits the music very well.

It's hard work to find things to nit-pick. But here's two minor things:
- Smile! Especially when your dancing becomes more energetic and outward-focused. Your serene expression is perfect in the slower parts, but I really wanted a flash of smile on occasion.
- When you drop your arms low it looks a bit like you're dropping their whole carriage - ie: stepping out of nicely-held-dancer-arms mode. Your arms are beautiful on the whole (though your right pinky sticks out...just like my left one does!). This is pretty minor - and perhaps it suits the really relaxed vibe or your dancing anyway.

That dress is lovely. I've noticed that those tight gelabayas always ride up higher than you expect! I'm quite tall, so your short hem-length is how mine inevitably end up. :(

What jewel said! :) If you'd like a more detailed review/feedback - I, among other dancers, offer video reviews affordably :)

Hey, where did you get that galabaya? It's hoooot. I like it a lot.

Jewel - Thank you! I wasn't sure if it was appropriate or not to smile during the song, but watching it again, I think you're right. I will definitely work on keeping dance posture when arms drop and putting my pinky in its place! lol As for the galabeya, I've just given up and am having one custom made because I LOVE the look, hate the ride-up.

David - That's very good to know! I'm going to keep that in mind for the future when funds are a bit more available (studio expenses are high this month). :) the galabeya is actually from Nourhan and Sharifwear... style A I think. I liked the fabric and fit and it's been one of the most loved costumes I own by both the GP and dancers.

Originally Posted by MaryRaks

Jewel - Thank you! I wasn't sure if it was appropriate or not to smile during the song, but watching it again, I think you're right. I will definitely work on keeping dance posture when arms drop and putting my pinky in its place! lol As for the galabeya, I've just given up and am having one custom made because I LOVE the look, hate the ride-up.

David - That's very good to know! I'm going to keep that in mind for the future when funds are a bit more available (studio expenses are high this month). :) the galabeya is actually from Nourhan and Sharifwear... style A I think. I liked the fabric and fit and it's been one of the most loved costumes I own by both the GP and dancers.

OOOH, I'm running to Nourhan SharifWear immediately.

Sure, anytime you need me - I'm here :)

You move very beautifully! I think that was a great performance. So far I have only watched your solo. You have a calm, peaceful, and confident presence on stage, which I like. However, my main recommendation would be to vary your energy a little. There *were* moments when you did this, but I wanted more. It looks like you were mainly dancing to the rhythm and to a certain tempo. I think if you added some times when you speed up and others where you slow down it would add a little more texture to your overall performance. Does that make sense? Maybe pick some points in the music when you follow a particular instrument or maybe the singer.
You need more videos!! I'd love to see more!

Mary,

Being there in person, I thought your expression was perfectly appropriate for the music. What doesn't show on the video and which I liked a lot was that you had some very nice tiny shimmery flutters going on that the faux assuit pattern really showed. While you didn't break out into a big grin during the more upbeat sections, I didn't really sense that you needed to because your movements became a little more outwardly focused. And even as the music rises, it has a sort of bittersweet quality to it, doesn't it? I think the camera angle doesn't show much of the expressiveness that I saw in person. Yes, the dress was a little short but so much so that it was disconcerting. Get a new one alittle longer. I love that faux assuit stuff!

Souzan

I saw this live and didn't even notice the costume being short at all. It was a wonderful performance.

I thought you did a great job! Good use of floor patterns and I felt you really felt the music. Your transitions between moves were nice and smooth. The only critique is to smile a little more, not a big smile just a small one goes a long way. Great job!!!!

For those who watched the video of Mary's students, the dancer on the far left is a very self-assured 10 year old who looks older than her age. The costumes were lovely frothy creations. It was a very nice show with lots of variety and a wonderful, attentive and appreciative audience. Plus a chocolate fountain. Every belly dance show needs one. Thank you Mary.

Souzan

I really enjoyed watching both clips - you should all be very proud.

Mary, like the others, I really enjoyed your relaxed style of dance. You covered the stage well, and I'd love to see more of your dancing. A few little things to work on, would be your extension, posture and commitment. They're not bad at all, but refining them may make your performance stronger.

Thank you for sharing! Bhuz feedback rocks.

Tina - Thanks! I am working on texture and variation a little more and I'll work on some of the layers you mentioned like following the singer, etc.

Souzan & Shala - Thanks!

As far as Kali goes (the 10 year old), she's just a trip. lol If she ever actually applied herself to practice more, she'd be fabulous!

Kizzie - I definitely agree... the song is a breakup-ish song, so I wasn't sure it's appropriate, but it may have gone better as far as dance is concerned.

Adishakti - Thank you for the feedback! I am taking notes of everything written to incorporate it into my practice time. :)

I, too, saw this performance in person, and it was lovely! Mary, I really love how relaxed and subtle your style is. That natural quality kept me on the edge of my seat (or, well, you know, hanging out of the side stage door! lol) through the whole song.

I haven't watched the video yet but I wanted to say something about those costumes that I recently found out. If it's let out a little at the hips(even if it fits perfect) it stops it from riding up. A friend had the same problem and a seamstress that we know let us in on the secret. She let out the hip area by maybe an inch and now it doesn't ride up at all. So don't give up on the costume just yet. That may fix the problem.

Mary - I thought the entire show (including Genevieve's performance, and especially Morocco) was excellent! And I agree your performance was even better in person.

Oh Souzan, I just realized who you are! I loved your performance as well. I was sitting with Cheryl near the front, and we were talking about how beautiful your coustume was. I'm having someone (Mary's seamstress) make me something similar.

Oh Mary, I loved your improv. It was just so gushy and lovely.
The ONLY thing that stuck out to me is you look down through most of the performance and I think looking at the audience or at least FAKE looking at the audience creates a connection and confidence.
The only reason I noticed is b/c I tend to do the samething. I truely enjoyed this performance.

Originally Posted by vron

Oh Souzan, I just realized who you are! I loved your performance as well. I was sitting with Cheryl near the front, and we were talking about how beautiful your coustume was. I'm having someone (Mary's seamstress) make me something similar.

Well, my gosh. Thanks. There sure were a bunch of us Bhuzzers there. I didn't realize you were there. I wish we could have all figured out who we were and had lunch! Maybe next time Mary does something we can come up with a secret Bhuzz handshake or some little thing that only Bhuzzers will recognize!

My dress is one of the Dahlal Saidi Jewels and I made the silver fringe belt to go with it and dress it up a little. They are so comfortable and fun to wear.

And speaking of costumes, didn't you just love Genevieve's pearl Golden Age costume?

Souzan

Oh yes let's plan to hook up at the next event. Any one going to Black Orchid this weekend, or Suhaila in Greenville next weekend?

I'm so happy we've got a few non-triabl events going on in the area now.

Originally Posted by Souzan

For those who watched the video of Mary's students, the dancer on the far left is a very self-assured 10 year old who looks older than her age. The costumes were lovely frothy creations. It was a very nice show with lots of variety and a wonderful, attentive and appreciative audience. Plus a chocolate fountain. Every belly dance show needs one. Thank you Mary.

Souzan

10!!!!! Wow are they looking older these days! Now I feel really old.

The troupe was great as well. Cute costumes, lovely dancing. I don't know their level so I won't speak to technique tho.

Mary, I yearn to be that relaxed on stage with a nice non-hurried tempo. I loved it.

Originally Posted by Souzan

There sure were a bunch of us Bhuzzers there. I didn't realize you were there. I wish we could have all figured out who we were and had lunch! Maybe next time Mary does something we can come up with a secret Bhuzz handshake or some little thing that only Bhuzzers will recognize!

We need Bhuzzer t-shirts to wear to workshops! ..g.:

Aww, thanks for the compliments, ladies! :) That Saidi Jewel looked great on you, Souzan. I've been stalking the Swap Meet and Dahlal to see if I can find one myself.

Originally Posted by vron

Oh yes let's plan to hook up at the next event. Any one going to Black Orchid this weekend, or Suhaila in Greenville next weekend?

I'm so happy we've got a few non-triabl events going on in the area now.

I'll be at Black Orchid this weekend. I wish I could be there for Suhaila, but I'll be there in spirit!

I decided to skip this weekend in Atlanta since I've been away from home every weekend for the past month. This weekend Saqra is coming to North Florida to do a one day workshop on improvisation in Panama City. Its a short drive for us so I am taking advantage of that opportunity. My hubby is going with me so he can go fishing while I am in the workshop. Its close enough that we can drive over early in the morning and drive home after the show.

The bellydancestore.com has those dresses too. Under folkloric dresses. I have beautiful orange and copper one from them.

Bhuz tee shirts! Yes, we need to do that! Any design ideas?

Souzan

They actually had Bhuz Tshirts back in the day when Jennifer first started Bhuz :)

Originally Posted by david

They actually had Bhuz Tshirts back in the day when Jennifer first started Bhuz :)

There a Bhuz shop on CafePress: BHUZ : BHUZ Belly Dance Central ... Bellydance Shop

Oh boy! I am going to have to get one of the Bhuz scarab ones--maybe the how many costumes? shirts and dye it pink!

Rya - I never would have thought of that! It's still time to let it go for "wardrobe refresh" purposes and because I have 2 custom on order, but that's definitely good information to know. :-p

Michelle - Thanks for pointing that out! I used to have a *really* bad habit of looking straight down all the time, so it's something I have to be very careful about but I don't always notice it unless I'm practically at the point where the top of my head is facing the audience! O.o

Souzan - I know I told you at the show, but everyone's right... your costume was just amazing.

Genevieve's pearl costume won one of my darling's "favorite costumes of the show" awards.

Linny - Thanks! The students are all in my level 2 class, which is I guess about early intermediate (starting layering, improv, etc). Some of them have been dancing a good bit longer than the others, and they have various training backgrounds before they came to my classes. They're wonderful about working on things though and yesterday we actually did a lot of cleaning in the choreography with the help of the video (and the fact that the studio floor didn't shake like that stage). :-p

Vron - Thank you! I definitely think the whole show was wonderful. Unfortunately I won't be at the BODF this weekend (relay for life show and studio recital) and will be missing Suhaila because the darling and I will be celebrating our anniversary in the Caribbean (yay beach!).

We should do shirts or something at the next event! Hmm... things to think about. ;-p

Right now the next "official" item on the radar is the holiday hafla with Lotus Niraja on Dec 11-12 (I think... it's a Saturday/Sunday), but there may be something else coming up at the end of August.

You're darling is a real cutie. Devoted belly dance husbands are wonderful, aren't they. Enjoy the beach!!!!

Very nice. I would echo the others who mentioned looking up a little more. Smile a bit when you first come out, even if the song is sad. It helps to bring the audience in to your experience - hey, girls, let me tell you what happened....