Thread: What would you do about this?

Hi,
Me and the other teachers at the dance school I teach at host a monthly hafla, and any dancer is welcome to perform.
There is a dancer that shows up at every hafla and dances as many numbers and as as long of numbers as we'll let her get a way with. She is not a student at our school, just shows up to perform.
She is a good dancer, a crowd favorite and fun to watch but... a bit of an attention seeker.
We have a window that over looks the stage so the dancers backstage can watch the action but it is in plain view of the audience as well.
This dancer likes to stand in the window, in no cover up, and dance to the music of the performer on stage. Very distracting and very rude in my opinion. The other teachers don't seem to mind her distracting the audience, at least they've never brought it up.
Other dancers and audience memebrs have come to me and told me they don't like her doing it but I am hesitant to talk to her since when we were both baby dancers we had a bit of a fight over something stupid. Now we are civil but not friendly to each other and it's a little obvious we don't get a long. I'd like to ask one of the other teachers to ask her to be more respectful of the performers onstage but I worry it will look like I am jealous or trying to start drama with her.
Should I just let it go... or ask that the complaints I get about her be redirected to another teacher who may be persuaded to talk to her after they hear enough of them?

Suggest that the dancers who complain speak directly to the diva-dancer as well as to the organizer of the hafla. Unless you are the organizer or the people complaining are your students, you should probably stay out of it.

Souzan

Maybe you could put a curtain up over the window?

I think you should ask one of the teachers to approach her saying audience members have found her dancing, while another performer is on stage dancing, distracting. That way she won't think you are out to get her.

If the teacher asks why you don't approach her yourself mention to the teacher that you both began at the same time and you don't think she would respect your request.

This is a very touchy situation you are in and I hope all goes well.

Azeeza

PS On second thought, perhaps it is best to stay out of it.

Send around a list of rules to all the participants and make everyone sign these as an agreement to follow. Include in the rules:
1. Coverups must be worn before and after performances
2. No dancing in front of the window or other distracting behavior while others are performing
3. Time slots limited to X minutes.

By giving the rules out to everyone, you diffuse the effects of having to single her out.

If she askes for multiple time slots, tell her she has one.

Sedonia

Damn that's rude. I agree with Sedonia, add some rules so everyone gets their share of time on stage. I remember my first time on stage at a hafla and it was transforming. That Diva is totally rude and disrespectful and her actions need to be nipped in the bud.

So far, if someone complains to me about her I've just smiled and said "I see, well, if it becomes a lasting problem I'll talk with the other teachers and see what we can do".
I don't care about how often she performs, our haflas are VERY informal and we often have a few open slots so if the dancers shows up and we have open slots, we'll ask if anyone would like to perform a second number. It's fair, and she has has as much of a right to take an open slot as the other dancers do.
It's just she has plenty of stage time... so why does she feel the need to distract from the other performers?!?
We do have a time limit and she always performs pieces just under the limit it so that's not really the problem either, JUST the window dancing.
The haflas are very laid back and so are the teachers.
I'm sure everyone thinks she's just SO inspired by the music she can't help it.
Everyone enjoys standing in the window to watch the dancer on stage and no one else breaks the cover-up rule.
I may speak with the other teachers but since I am pretty sure they know that we don't get along it may not go well.
Maybe I'll say something the lines of:
"You may have noticed Diva and I don't get along, so I feel really uncomfortable bringing this up but I have had a few complaints and agree that she is distracting. Because of our history, I don't feel it is appropriate to talk to her about it myself as she may take it the wrong way."
Then we can decide whether a note to all the dancers is best or not.
I like the idea of asking the complainers to speak with the Diva themselves but I know they figure it's our show so we should handle he problem and they are right.

Originally Posted by Parisa

We have a window that over looks the stage so the dancers backstage can watch the action but it is in plain view of the audience as well.
This dancer likes to stand in the window, in no cover up, and dance to the music of the performer on stage. Very distracting and very rude in my opinion. The other teachers don't seem to mind her distracting the audience, at least they've never brought it up

Even baby belly dancers who perform need to exercise a degree of professional performance curtosy regardless if she's a crowd favorite or not. Dancing during someone's set where the audience is distracted is disrespectful and rude.

Maybe the subject of what this dancer is doing should be brought up in discussion amongst the hafli organizers before the next hafli. If a meeting takes place, mention the reactions of the dancers and the audience. If the other dancers who are performing see that the problem is being ignored, they may stop wanting to perform. The supportive audience members may decide not to show up because of this one dancer being a stage hog. Ignoring the problem won't make it go away.

Are there any rules for dancers performing at the hafli? If there are not, maybe there should be. Cover ups...required. No dancing in front of the window while someone is performing. I like Monica's idea of putting up a curtain but this dancer seem like the type to pull back the curtain and dance anyway.

Should I just let it go... or ask that the complaints I get about her be redirected to another teacher who may be persuaded to talk to her after they hear enough of them.

Ask yourself if you can let it go. If not, the problem should be addressed. Maybe it will take a group of you to address her and what she's doing.

I worry it will look like I am jealous or trying to start drama with her.

If the complaints come from the hafli organizer(s) and/or the perfomers and audience members, I don't think it will seem like you're trying to start drama. Safety in numbers. I'm sure if the hafli participants took the time to put a dance together and get the guts to perform it in front of a live audience, they would appreciate the problem being addressed!

Wow, that's really rude!
I would say it's a good idea to stay out of it as much as you can, but not if it means ignoring the situation entirely. I agree to direct the people's complaints to another organizer of the event. Or, is it possible for the dancers to watch the show from the audience instead of from the window? That way, you can put a curtain up. Even if other dancers are wearing cover ups and watching from the window, I would find that just as distracting. Perhaps one would have to miss the performance directly before theirs while getting backstage, but I think that would be much nicer than being distracted by other people watching/dancing behind the window!

Originally Posted by Parisa

said "I see, well, if it becomes a lasting problem I'll talk with the other teachers and see what we can do".

well, clearly it has become a lasting problem. i don't think there is any need to state to the teachers that you dont get along with DivaWindowDancer. That just draws negative attention to yourself.

perhaps those that don't like this behavior can approach the person in charge as a group. that will make a big impact on how serious the subject is, and will not single anyone person out as a complainer.

it is incredibly rude. if it was a music school, those observing would not play their instruments along with the performer because they were "inspired"!

it just comes down to respect for others. i agree that written ground rules that apply to everyone would be a good way to handle it. the rules could be posted in the dressing room and at each event, you could go into the dressing room and say something like "thank you all for being here, i know you all will abide by the new rules, if you are unfamiliar with the new rules please take a moment to read them [pointing to where they are posted on the wall], and have a great show". that way no one feels singled out or insulted.

i feel bad for you and the other dancers to have to deal with this nonsense. but there's one in every croud right?

oh, and you could make mention of the gilded serpent article [recent thread] about the importance of coverups and recommend everyone read it.

Well, I agree its really rude but if you dont have guideline for everyone posted or written out or expressed by your backstage manager, stupid things like this will continue to happen. Its amazing to me what people consider as "Ok" behavior. Hang up a sheet or something if you dont want to write a policy. Agreed too that coverups should be included in guidelines/rules for your event.

If the halfa is so informal that you do not think you can hand out rules, you could always post them on the window and also in the dressing room.

As a regular attendee of that hafla, I haven't noticed this, although I do have 2 or 3 ideas about who the offender might be. I guess I am far more interested in whomever's "on stage", than what's going on in the side room. I think I saw someone dancing in there once, but I thought she was just warming up.

The window is too high to show hipwork, right? If the movements are small and low, I don't think it's a big deal. If there have been multiple complaints, then the teachers should collectively decide how to handle it, so everyone's on the same page.

As for the coverup, I don't feel that's a big deal either, but you are part of the group running the hafla. If you feel it reflects negatively on the program, then the teachers should collectively handle this as well...perhaps with an email to all the regular performers, and posts in the appropriate places.

What I do find annoying are the noisy, squirmy children that sometimes attend. But I believe that these haflas should be family-friendly.

I'm with da Sage....I have an idea of who might fit that description, but unless this problem is new to this new season of haflas, it's not something I really took note of.

As someone who's performed at those haflas, I do think that it's nice to be able to use the music of the person dancing before you to do some shimmies or hip drops to warm up and "get in the mood." However, that should be brief, and kept out of sight of the audience. If someone is full-on busting a groove, and in view of the audience, that is being disrespectful. Those are cramped quarters back there!

Also, I agree that coverups for everybody is not a bad idea. (Except for the beginning classes that some teachers bring in...they're exempt. ^_^)

A good way to implement any "performer etiquette protocols" (regarding dancing during others' numbers, wearing coverups, and time limits) would be to post them on the Tribe, and also e-mail the guidelines to the performers after they sign up to perform.

I agree with most of the posters that it isn't really appropriate and very rude!

Something needs to be done. I like the make a rules idea. Then everyone can be on the table about things.