Thread: Audience participation at nursing home gig?

I have a nursing home gig coming up and have never done one before. Any tips on how to get the audience participating without breaking anyone? I don't want to exacerbate anyone's injuries or start new ones.

Suggestions, comments?

Thanks!

Encourage them to clap along with the music while you perform.

Make your way around the perimeter, to give the residents a chance to see your costume up close, and let them touch it.

There will be members of the nursing home staff on hand - get them to dance with you. The residents will enjoy seeing them dance with you.

Give a "lesson" to the residents - teach them how to hand hand ripples, snake arms, head slides, and rib cage circles. These are all things they can do while seated.

Have fun!

I've done a few nursing home gigs - I hope some one there knows CPR!!
You may get applause, disdainful looks and/or looks of horror. Wear a conservative costume. I have had my bum pinched by old men. .w.: And stroked. Trembly stroking - kinda not nice. Some of the residents might beam at you rapturously and be delighted you are there while others will be a little confused. I have had a cat hurled in my direction (it may have jumped...). If more than 50% of the residents are actually awake you are off to a flying start. One of my students made the mistake of striking a pose next to a candy apple red zimmer frame and commenting that it went with her costume and had the owner of said frame shout at her to leave it alone because it didn't belong to her. Some of the residents will clap their hands over their ears grimmacing before the music gets lowered to an acceptable level and some will cup their ears and ask you to speak up. You might be stopped in the middle of it all for a chat. Probably best not to plan a full on caberet show, and use gentle music. I have had war veterans tell me they were in Turkey during the war and saw belly dancers then. I never know how to reply to that. My grandad was in Turkey during the war and said the belly dancers were - popular entertainment.
The only partcipation I ever had was tea and biscuits at the end. Oh, nope - one lovely gentleman asked me to waltze. You might get a new student out of the staff.
You never know what might happen, but the residents who do enjoy it and have a good time are worth every minute of getting ready and driving there!!
:thumbs_up:

try to find out, when you arrive, who might be able to get up and do a couple of gentle side to side hip movements, little twists, things like that.

kahlilahnz is right about the hand gestures and clapping for those who can't get up.

and remember to speak very slowly, clearly and loudly when speaking to the older residents.

parties for the elderly can be challenging, but also very rewarding. they will need lots of patience, but you will bring them a lot of joy.

All excellent advice. Also - play your zills quietly- the ringing can possibly be unpleasant with hearing aids.
I did one 90th birthday at a retirement home where half the people (who were residents) were NOT in chairs. Be flexible for anything.

You can grab a cane off one of the oldies and swing it or balance it on your head - good for a laugh. I've always enjoyed my aged care gigs - usually the people (both men and women) love the spectacle, and I've never felt uncomfortable in a full bedlah ensemble. There's always a few men who start to hyperventilate and the women have a good chuckle at them. Depending upon the level of care, I'd expect to dance for them, rather than with them. Leaning towards someone and giving them a shoulder shimmy is a nice way to interact (shoulder or back-first, of course, not boobs-first!).

I've also had a lot of war vets say I remind them of their time in service - many mention being stationed in Egypt during WW2. I even got hired for a man's 80th birthday once because he was always going on about the 'dancing girls' back then!

All of the above - I second everything Khalila said, especially!

Some populations are MUCH more active than others. In small town nursing homes, I've often found the if-anyone-is-awake-you're-doing-great variety. In bigger cities & higher end retirement homes, it's not like that at all and the residents are usually active and happy to see us.

Note the huge difference between 'nursing home' (people who need a LOT of medical help & can't be cared for at home) and 'retirement home' (people who don't want to have to mow their own lawns and do their own cleaning any more).

Anyway... for a true nursing home, my audience participation consisted mostly of dancing around the room, taking someone's hand and dancing 'with' them for a moment, touching a shoulder, thanking them for 'coming' to the show...etc.

The staff would never dance with me. They would, however, always position the guy they knew had a foot fetish right up front so he'd try to follow me across my staging area in his wheelchair.

i used to do a series of these for a chain of nursing homes every summer.

i would say no zills. they loved veils. i would wear very colorful bright stuff & dance close. the old ladies would oh & aaww. yes the old guys will oggle. the only time i've ever had anybody yell "shake it baby" was a 90 yr old woman?!!

i just did very average bellydance stuff not anything really modern.

i found they always wanted to talk so be prepared for brief Q & As.

also they often scheduled us at lunch so there may be family there too. be real appropriate there may be grandkids sitting around.

bring cards the nurses might want to take your class. tina

Nursing homes are actually lovely places to dance in - last time I did a volunteer show at one, the residents really got into it and one of them got up and waltzed me around (his family was there, and apparently the resident was a professional ballroom dancer in his younger years). Some of them will show their appreciation very plainly - clapping, waving their hands, reaching out to pat you on the arm or touch their costumes - while others will simply watch and maybe smile a little. Considering that many of the residents will be barely conscious of what's going on around them, any visible engagement whatsoever, including something as simple as looking directly at you, should be taken as encouragement. Others may not show any facial expression but might try to get up and dance with you a little bit. Basically, just remember that the residents may express their engagement and interest in very subtle ways. The staff will usually show interest very plainly - clapping along, vocally encouraging you, and encouraging the residents to do the same.

For ways of interacting with the residents, as I mentioned some might want to get up and dance with you. Hold their hands, step back and forth a little bit with them, be gentle and allow them to move. If some reach out to you from their chairs (standard or wheelchair) but don't stand up, the same thing applies - hold their hand, keep dancing, and maybe just gently swing their arm back and forth a bit. When it's time to move on, do so, but don't be surprised if it is a little difficult to break the grip or if they don't let go of your hand too easily. Some of those residents can have a grip like steel! Definitely encourage the residents to clap along, and see if you can get the staff to join you in some more active moves, as doing so can encourage the residents to engage a little more fully.

Big, flowy movements are good, as it will be easier for those with poor eyesight to see what you are doing. If there is enough room for a veil, it's a great visual prop for the residents. Don't use zills, as their pitch can be really, really harsh on those using hearing aids.

That's pretty much all I can think of! It's such an easy-going crowd, and even though it'll be a quieter sort of audience, I find that it's really, really fun and very gratifying; you'll really add some brightness and interest to the day for the residents and the staff. :D

My first teacher always brought along a bag of scarves to pass out for audience participation. We would dance and wave them around, the residents would wave them around from their seats. They seemed to really enjoy it.

Everyone has pretty much summed it up well - just be prepared for the spectrum - I dance twice a month at the same facility, for two different programs. For one program, the patients are very lively and get up and dance with me, some of them even try to swing their own canes around to mimick me (that's a little scary...). The patient at the other program right across the hall are much less mobile, and I have to do a lot more "in your seat" participation.

They all love it, though, and it makes me happy to see them so happy!

When I used to dance at convalescent centers and retirement homes, I would purchase large bags of long scarves from dollar stores or garage sales and hand those out to the residents. They LOVED waiving them around and I didn't have to ask for them back...before I did this, getting props back was difficult if not embarassing...sometimes the less 'with it' residents would SCREAM that the veil I gave them was 'theirs'. Avoid handing out anything that you want back...
Gia

No zills, beware loud mizmars. Yes for veils and big flowing swirly stuff. Nursing homes are very fun.

I just want to say thanks to all who go out and dance for the old folks. I've got a grandma in an assisted living facility, and she and her friends all just love any kind of entertainment. She especially loves the woman who comes and plays the accordian!

We bring a box with small colorful scarves for them to wave and shakers and rhythm sticks for them to play. It is fun to teach them a ME rhythm and have them accompany the music!

All the tips above are great tips - another is to teach them the typical Arabic words/phrases to use (especially if it's a regular gig). Words like "Aiwa!" and "Yallah!" and "Habibi" so that they can get into it. If the residents don't feel comfortable doing that, the staff might, and at least it's something to feed off of when your crowd is the less rowdy type.

I've volunteered (as a Candystriper) and danced in nursing homes, and I've always enjoyed my time there. Make the most of it!

I was a Candystriper too, Viritate! wasn't that an amazing experience? I was 14 or 15, I think, when I started. I'd like to get my son into some kind of volunteer work when he turns 14, but I don't think he's going to be very cooperative...

Originally Posted by Lauren_

They would, however, always position the guy they knew had a foot fetish right up front so he'd try to follow me across my staging area in his wheelchair.

..l;, ..l;, ..l;,
[interesting how that would be creepy and not funny if he was not elderly]

Originally Posted by Gia al Qamar

When I used to dance at convalescent centers and retirement homes, I would purchase large bags of long scarves from dollar stores or garage sales and hand those out to the residents. They LOVED waiving them around and I didn't have to ask for them back...before I did this, getting props back was difficult if not embarassing...sometimes the less 'with it' residents would SCREAM that the veil I gave them was 'theirs'. Avoid handing out anything that you want back...
Gia

excellent point! a great reminder to be ready for idiosyncratic behavior

Wow thanks! Those are all great ideas/tips. Thanks for preparing me for what may (or may not) happen! I don't want people sleeping/bored, but I also don't want to run the risk of someone's dignity being lost if they hurt themselves dancing or fell. I would feel terrible. I'll stick to scarves/hand movements. Getting the staff dancing is a great idea. The patients will talk about that every time the staff do their rounds.
Thanks for the no zill warning...it makes complete sense, but is something I would never have thought about.

Thanks again:)

depending on the type of home they may be heavily medicated & pass out. so focus i who you have that's alert.

i've danced;

at retirement homes & they are usually pretty peppy.

nursing homes; whoboy. one the level of illness isn't baad but they are medicated. another is a terminal illness facility & can be a downer.

i have also danced at homes where the clients were more handicapped. adult retards etc. then there was one where the clients seems like they were all brain injuries. they were mostly young males. they cornered one bder & wanted her phone number.

not wanting to scare you but be prepared for odd verbage. sometimes the combination of Alzheimer's & meds produce weird behavior. i have found nurses are real good at whisking patients out that start to act out. i had an experience where one senile old guy kept yelling i was fat & then another senile old guy yelled at him to shut the bleep up i was a beautiflul woman. the nurses told the first guy he was bad ??!!

over all they are fun gigs & especially if you want to rack up performance miles very good practice. tina

Originally Posted by sabrinabellydancer

[interesting how that would be creepy and not funny if he was not elderly]

At a nursing home show I did with a troupe of women, we got up some of the more able residents to dance with us at the end. I got a gentleman who held both of my hands firmly, eyes fixed on my chest, who declared loudly "Who says I'm dead? I'm not dead yet!" I replied "No, sir, you certainly are not!" He was happy enough to be alive I just couldn't really be offended, if anything glad I was able to make his day.

Be sure to schedule your visit on a non-bingo day. We found out the hard way that the residents live for bingo time and get very impatient if you're dancing even a minute into the scheduled bingo game. :))))

Originally Posted by rassicahl

Be sure to schedule your visit on a non-bingo day. We found out the hard way that the residents live for bingo time and get very impatient if you're dancing even a minute into the scheduled bingo game. :))))

True. You never, ever, want to interfere with Bingo. Seriously. Although I am laughing, you really don't.

Originally Posted by kiyaana

My first teacher always brought along a bag of scarves to pass out for audience participation. We would dance and wave them around, the residents would wave them around from their seats. They seemed to really enjoy it.

I'm glad you mentioned this, its exactly what I was going to say. I only wanted to add that they should maybe not be valuable scarves that you want back. I had a set of matching scarves that one lady would not give back, LOL! I was happy to let her keep them. The next time I went back - months later - there she was, waving the scarves!

Lucy of DC has a few videos of her doing a performance at a nursing home and I think the way she does it is great:

[ame=http://youtube.com/watch?v=Cdwd-jo2Q9I]YouTube - Lucy Washington DC - Taht el shibbak[/ame] - Part one
[ame=http://youtube.com/watch?v=f3hhjliiro4]YouTube - Lucy Washington DC - Taht el shibbak - Part 2[/ame] - Part two
[ame=http://youtube.com/watch?v=ZOg3NuBMq3c]YouTube - Lucy Washington DC - Taht el shibbak - Part 3[/ame] - Part three

Heres another one:

[ame=http://youtube.com/watch?v=YLssxF-C-ws]YouTube - Lucy Bellydancer - Melaya Leff! (Part 1)[/ame] - Part One
[ame=http://youtube.com/watch?v=rbPVID8zWVE]YouTube - Lucy Bellydancer - Melaya Leff! (Part 2)[/ame] - Part two

I think you could do something like this (walking around the audience if there is room, and allowing everybody to see what you are doing and wearing)

Originally Posted by *Shira*

Make your way around the perimeter, to give the residents a chance to see your costume up close, and let them touch it.

Sorry, I'm a health care worker and I know where those hands have been. They are not touching my costume.....

Also, beware of some of the men. We dance at a veterans home periodically and the nurses always keep the "grabbers" together in the back of the room.

Also, some facilities seem to keep the clients very drugged while others don't. That could also play a part in how much audience participation you can do.

A few questions, since I was just asked to do a gig at a retirement home:

1. Are zills an absolute no-no?

2. Should I buy a one-piece costume? I only have bedlahs.

3. I've never tried performing a veil dance. Is it worth it to try anyway for this particular occasion?

Thanks! :)

Originally Posted by Shajar

A few questions, since I was just asked to do a gig at a retirement home:

1. Are zills an absolute no-no?

2. Should I buy a one-piece costume? I only have bedlahs.

3. I've never tried performing a veil dance. Is it worth it to try anyway for this particular occasion?

Thanks! :)

1. I don't think they're an absolute no-no. I've used them without any obvious damage to the residents. However, quieter zills, and not ringing them too close to anyone might be the go, to ensure they don't hurt people wearing hearing aids. I've also noticed nursing homes often have the music down low, and I like using zills to pick things up a bit.

2. Nah, my nursing home clients have always loved the spectacle of a bedlah. Older people like to see 'nice young things'...including the women (and that's why I love nursing homes - in their eyes, I'm still young and hot!!!)

3. You'd be fine to stick to what you're comfortable with. However, this could be a perfect opportunity to try out a new routine in a relatively non-threatening environment. I like throwing in a slow veil number at a nursing home because I imagine they like it's prettyness, and I feel that they'll allow me this slower-paced breather.

You never know what you will get. They might be very active. They might just sit and watch.
I always ask the nurses if there is anyone I should "pick" on. I almost always make the nurses dance, too.

Just remember that older men are NOT harmless. The only places I have ever been touched were in retirement homes. Don't let your guard down.