Thread: Oh LOL! You have got to be kidding buddy!

So yesterday, I get a message on myspace from a drummer in the area looking for new Dancers in the area. He sends me his number and tells me to call. I call him, I get no answer and so I leave a message. I finally get a call back about 3 hours later....

Me: Hello?
Drummer: Hello.

<Insert pleasant small talk>

Me: I see you got my message. I believe you were looking for dancers?
Him: Yeah we are always looking for new dancers... can you tell me a little about yourself, how long have you been dancing who have you worked with?
Me: *rattle off spiel*... And Ive been a student of "so and so" for about a year
Him: OH! So and So! Im glad she is still alive!
Me: mmmm... yeah. Why wouldnt she be?
Him: Well shes been around a LONG time....

<insert me trying not to be offended>

Me: Yeah, shes got lots of experience and shes a great lady. Anyway...
Him: So are you married? How many kids you got?
Me: I am married and I don't have any children. Not looking for any. I fail to see why that's relevant but...
Him: Yeah so, what do you have going on this weekend?
Me: Nothing really, what have you got for me?
Him: Well I'm glad you asked... Ive got this new thing Im trying to get girls for (my ears immediately perked when he said "girls" and not dancers... I should have known right then) My buddy owns a few strip clubs in the area and we need some high energy...
Me: Whoa, let me stop you right there dude... I dont do strip joints.
Him: Well you don't have to take your clothes off or anything...
Me: I dont associate with those kind of places though... Im not understanding what it has to do with what I do.
Him: Forget it, there are plenty of other girls out there who would die to have a job like this...
Me: Well then I would suggest you hire those girls then...
Him: Yeah.
Me: If you have regular jobs like weddings, birthdays or family events let me know... but Im not a stripper.
Him: Yeah well we need young girls anyway.

<now thoroughly angry>

Me: What do you mean by that? Im 23 how much younger do you need? If I was any younger Id be practically underage!
Him: Well I just meant full of life.
Me: Uh hunh... alright well... you get something else that comes up call me if not the that's cool too... nice talking to you.

*click*

CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS DUDE? This guy is NOT GP. I could understand this coming from GP. This is a guy who is well immersed in the Dance and Arabic entertainment world here in MI. OMG... I was so floored.

Above all Im finding myself a little discouraged because the only requests I have been getting so far have been like this. Its really disheartening.

Hi Amber! It sounds like you handled that pig really well. What's a GP, by the way? Gross Person? Great Pervert? He'd definitely qualify then! Ah well, perhaps you need some PR someplace other than Myspace? Good luck!

Originally Posted by KHari3

Hi Amber! It sounds like you handled that pig really well. What's a GP, by the way? Gross Person? Great Pervert? He'd definitely qualify then! Ah well, perhaps you need some PR someplace other than Myspace? Good luck!

General population...

And Im working on the promotional materials. I ordered my business cards this morning, and they should be here in a few days. Im going to have my husband do a flyer and website for me soon. Hopefully sometime this week.

What is going? I just posted a reply on someone else's thread about a guy offering money for sex to one of our dancers and now this.

This is ridiculous. You're 23! By no definition does that make you old. Maybe he hasn't been turned down hard enough and your frigid response set him straight. Good for you. Do you know if other girls are accepting these types of requests?

Holy crap, are things ever getting crazy around here! I can't believe you had to deal with that, or the other post Mayliz mentioned. The nerve of people. I too worry about other people who *might* be willing to take up the offer...

Oh my... wonder what he pays...jk

Originally Posted by david

Oh my... wonder what he pays...jk

I dont know but I can forward him your info if youd like.... LOL J/k..l;,

DaVid, I think that would be a great revenge! ..l;,

Originally Posted by david

Oh my... wonder what he pays...jk

Naughty boy ... :Awink:

Originally Posted by Mayliz

What is going? I just posted a reply on someone else's thread about a guy offering money for sex to one of our dancers and now this.

This is ridiculous. You're 23! By no definition does that make you old. Maybe he hasn't been turned down hard enough and your frigid response set him straight. Good for you. Do you know if other girls are accepting these types of requests?

I dont know... The way he said it he implied that he was speaking about other dancers in the area... but knowing this kind of skeeze he was probably lying just to make me feel bad or get me to change my mind....

I know for a fact that none of the dancers I know would take a job like that.

I just read Yazeenas thread too... WOW.

Originally Posted by Amber_moon

I know for a fact that none of the dancers I know would take a job like that.

He's probably getting pissed/frustrated that no one will do it, and he's likely promised that he could some up with some "girls". Of course, the reason has to be that you are all a bunch of repressed, 80 year old biddys on the inside. ..c:: It couldn't possibly be that he and his offer are both gross, inappropriate and offensive.

Originally Posted by Mayliz

What is going? I just posted a reply on someone else's thread about a guy offering money for sex to one of our dancers and now this.

This is ridiculous. You're 23! By no definition does that make you old. Maybe he hasn't been turned down hard enough and your frigid response set him straight. Good for you. Do you know if other girls are accepting these types of requests?

woah who was this mayliz?! anyone i know??
edit: nvm i saw what you were talking about. i thought you meant one of the girls at the STUDIO lol

and wow, can you say CREEPY? ugh, scumbag

This would be a fine time to remind everyone of Zumarrad's excellent poem:

Pervy Men Are Everywhere!

Originally Posted by zfejzic

woah who was this mayliz?! anyone i know??
edit: nvm i saw what you were talking about. i thought you meant one of the girls at the STUDIO lol

and wow, can you say CREEPY? ugh, scumbag

No, no. Not from our studio. That's funny though. Can you imagine? Down in OBT doing veil tricks! LOL.

Originally Posted by laura 2

He's probably getting pissed/frustrated that no one will do it, and he's likely promised that he could some up with some "girls". Of course, the reason has to be that you are all a bunch of repressed, 80 year old biddys on the inside. ..c:: It couldn't possibly be that he and his offer are both gross, inappropriate and offensive.

Word.

Originally Posted by Mayliz

No, no. Not from our studio. That's funny though. Can you imagine? Down in OBT doing veil tricks! LOL.

lmao
..l;,

Boy oh boy! This is crazy. Well, I got calls before similar until I said this is BELLYDANCE class just like a ballet, tap, jazz class where it is FAMILY oriented.

I bet you anything a professional drummer who is legit would never do strip club offers nor would ever offer to any proffessional bellydancer to do that. You caught the red flag right off the bat.

Hugs,
Amani

Oh man Amber. What a gross sad man.

Originally Posted by _Sarai_

Oh man Amber. What a gross sad man.

LOL yeah it was gross.but thankfully not as bad as the email poor Yazeena got!

Originally Posted by *Shira*

This would be a fine time to remind everyone of Zumarrad's excellent poem:

Pervy Men Are Everywhere!

I honestly snorted water out my nose reading that.

..c::Ha ha, that conversation sounds almost like some of the online dating conversations I've had to terminate!

ew. I would have washed my cell phone out with soap after that convo!

There was a club in Windsor that was trying to hire belly dancers for monthly shows. I looked it up online beforehand and discovered it was a gentleman's club/exotic dance club/strip club. I called the guy back incredulous. How did he miss that little detail when we spoke? Sorry, I only work in "family" clubs and restaurants. He explained they were trying to do something "different" once a month, that it would have more of a restaurant atmosphere. "You don't have to take your clothes off honey." Oh honey, I know that. But will there be other girls there? "Yea." Ok well I don't work in that environment and I don't know any other belly dancers that work in that environment. Good luck.

The thing that was annoying was that the guy got my number from a musician who has worked with me and other belly dancers in the area and should know the deal! But the fact that el managero didn't say right off the bat what kind of club it was tells me loud and clear that his little innocent act - "what's the big deal honey" - was all act. He knew very well I wouldn't have taken the job if I'd known it wasn't a normal dance club.

Frankly, it was the lying, significant omission of significant details that annoyed me more than being asked to dance there. It might not have been a big deal, maybe it was a classy place, but could you imagine showing up thinking you were dancing at a normal club and it's a topless bar? Oy.

Ok now you have to tell me who it was called you! LOL I have my suspicions...

Originally Posted by nadira82

Frankly, it was the lying, significant omission of significant details that annoyed me more than being asked to dance there. It might not have been a big deal, maybe it was a classy place, but could you imagine showing up thinking you were dancing at a normal club and it's a topless bar? Oy.

Ok now you have to tell me who it was called you! LOL I have my suspicions...

YES! Exactly! I sent you a PM.

Wow. I've seen some clubs trying to get bellydance nights together before around here (which most quality dancers still avoided b/c of the scene at the club) but never and out and out strip club before.

I wouldn't worry or get mad about his comments though, he probably just had some attacks in his head ready for a rejection, esp b/c he probably got them from other dancers as well. Sounds like a a-hole. You gotta watch those musicians lol.

But there is already enough confusion between bellydance and stripping in some people's minds when they don't know alot about bellydancing. So it's always good not only to avoid the strip clubs, but also any risque places.

Originally Posted by JShane

Wow. I've seen some clubs trying to get bellydance nights together before around here (which most quality dancers still avoided b/c of the scene at the club) but never and out and out strip club before.

I wouldn't worry or get mad about his comments though, he probably just had some attacks in his head ready for a rejection, esp b/c he probably got them from other dancers as well. Sounds like a a-hole. You gotta watch those musicians lol.

But there is already enough confusion between bellydance and stripping in some people's minds when they don't know alot about bellydancing. So it's always good not only to avoid the strip clubs, but also any risque places.

WOW! Your photographs are amazing!!!!!

I agree about the sleezy places thing. Im pretty open minded about a lot of things. And you will find me no prude, however, I realize that there is also a thin line between personal expression and having a good reputation. Here where I live it seems a lot of your work depends on your reputation and it certainly does precede you. Its a very tight knit (everybody knows everybody) community here and if so and so has seen you dance at JonJons Topless Bar then you are a stripper and no families are going to hire you for their events.

Im extremely new to this as well and Im starting realize that I am treading on thin ice over shark infested waters too. One mistake in either direction could end up costing me a spot somewhere... I'm constantly checking and rechecking to make sure I haven't offended anyone. My teacher has on several occasions laid it out quite flat for us that reputation is everything. If it gets damaged it could ruin your career.

So... because of this, Ive absolved myself to staying away from all kinds of places. Strip bars included.

Originally Posted by Amber_moon

My teacher has on several occasions laid it out quite flat for us that reputation is everything. If it gets damaged it could ruin your career.

So... because of this, Ive absolved myself to staying away from all kinds of places. Strip bars included.

But... but!

Hmmm. *starts a spinoff thread*

You sure can't beat the lighting in those clubs....(ducks and runs)

Originally Posted by doozer

you sure can't beat the lighting in those clubs....(ducks and runs)

lol spotlight!