Thread: inexperienced PERFORMER?????

This guy emailed me about his need for 2 belly dancers in 5 days to perform this saturday. In the email he said he's from this Bollywood Radio Station. I was pretty ecstatic.

I called, then realized I can't do it. I asked for a flyer to this event but it's his friend's wedding....why do you claim the radio station title when it has NOTHING to do with this???

My biggest ARRRRGHHHHH and..c:: was the fact that he kept wanting "younger" faces. I recommended him several top names in my area since I couldn't do it. He rejected all of them, saying that albeit they're "good," he's tired of them. I understand that -cuz the dancer in question had been in the area for ~ 20 years. So business is business, and there's no business like show business...

So I suggested another less "prevalent" dancer -and he knew her as well -saying she looked old. (she's 30), so I kept suggesting more professional dancers.

He rejected them all. Why?

They're too old.
They've been around here too long.
We want a new face.
She doesn't have to have awards, as long as she can dance.
"I've seen them all. We want a newer face. A newer dancer. A younger one."
I'll get the chance to call him tomorrow and clarify....

The optimistic me wants to say -okay maybe I'm just interpreting it wrong -and thinking he wants a SEXY, and worse, UNPROFESSIONAL dancer who can just look sexy and fling some extremities to the music.

But in general, it's not his fault. My problem is that there are plenty of absolutely DROP DEAD gorgeous girls here who belly dance, whose talent isn't too shabby, but not exactly up to par either, you know what I mean? They are willing to accept the sometimes undercut pays, or receive the SAME pay. I guess the audience can't tell the difference anyways as far as dancing abilities....And then I feel guilty that I didn't refer him to the 2 acquaintances because he'll just give future jobs to them.

Maybe I'm just taking invites to gigs too seriously???????
Maybe it could be just a small timer with some skills to go woo a crowd???
Personally, anything short of close to perfection/professionally then you don't deserve it and shouldn't do it.

....Do I make any sense? 4am...*sigh* I hope I do.

I feel like I have to sacrifice that greedy part of me and so no, because if I can't do the job right -then I shouldn't do it, and thus shouldn't receive money. That's just me. I feel like a little kid -but but mommy! the other kids are doing it!!!!

*sigh*

I guess it's just my insane desire to be invited to do events, the money, and of course the experience at the expense of the audience's warped image of true bellydance, and respect for you and everyone else who stays true to the art of bellydance, and those who don't want to see it fall into the hands of sexier-than-thou job-"thieves." There's nothing I can do to stop that, because the demand will be there.

__________________________________________________ ______

-The Curious Monkey

Sounds like all he wants is Cute-in-a-Costume-Dances-Cheap.

I'd leave it at that. You can't do the gig, you've made suggestions of reputable dancers, and for whatever reason he doesn't want to book them. Leave it there. It's his problem, not yours, and it sounds like a complete waste of your time and emotional energy trying to find him a "suitable" dancer, or trying to second guess what he's looking for.

Originally Posted by beafarhana

Sounds like all he wants is Cute-in-a-Costume-Dances-Cheap.

I'd leave it at that. You can't do the gig, you've made suggestions of reputable dancers, and for whatever reason he doesn't want to book them. Leave it there. It's his problem, not yours, and it sounds like a complete waste of your time and emotional energy trying to find him a "suitable" dancer, or trying to second guess what he's looking for.

Exactly - I'd leave him to it...

Why don't these people just 'fess up ( as you say) that they want someone on the cheap?

He doesn't want a bellydancer. He wants a model.

Originally Posted by sandyw239

....And then I feel guilty that I didn't refer him to the 2 acquaintances because he'll just give future jobs to them.

If this is the type of job he offers, and it is not the type you want, who cares? I know I keep saying this, and it may very well be more wishful-thinking than true, BUT... what you want is customers who want YOUR brand (of dancing or dancers or events or whatever), not a 'generic' bellydancer(s). The first customer will pay your price. The second one wants someone to swing by in a shiny costume for $25. So if this event is not going to enhance your brand, don't be associated with it. The local talent agency will be glad to send plenty of beautiful models in shiny costumes who will procede to try to make themselves invisible because they know they cannot really dance... it will be great entertainment!

I would have quit trying to help him after he rejected the first couple of people I referred.

I would have said, "I'm sorry, but I've already suggested the qualified dancers that I know of. Since you don't seem to want them, I'm afraid I can't help you."

Originally Posted by maurazebra

The local talent agency will be glad to send plenty of beautiful models in shiny costumes who will procede to try to make themselves invisible because they know they cannot really dance... it will be great entertainment!

This would be the best course of action. A bunch of pretty girls in Fredericks of Hollywood "genie" costumes, lounging around on cushions, feeding each other grapes. Dancing? Not so much.

And some smart, cultured person at the party goes up to the organizer and says, "I thought you said there were gonna be belly dancers!"

Oh snap! Alas, we can dream

What Shira said.

Originally Posted by ANA_bellydancer

He doesn't want a bellydancer. He wants a model.

an event planning place around here once hired "actresses who had taken a few lessons" because all the dancers they found were "too old and fat". the quotes are literally what they said. at least this guy has enough shame to disguise what he's saying.

just popping in to say that i really appreciate how honest and candid you are, sandy. its really refreshing to have someone new to bhuz openly ask these sorts of questions and be so open to the responses from more seasoned bhuzzers.

and for admitting to greedy thoughts (cuz i have them too!) here's a money shower

Originally Posted by emtink

just popping in to say that i really appreciate how honest and candid you are, sandy. its really refreshing to have someone new to bhuz openly ask these sorts of questions and be so open to the responses from more seasoned bhuzzers.

I was just thinking the same thing. I started performing way too soon and never took advantage of amazing resources like Bhuz, because I didn't even know that they existed. If somebody offered me this gig as a noob, I would've probably jumped on it ..c::

Sandy, you rock! I totally admire how you've stepped up to the plate and asked all these important questions. Your patient, conscientious attitude will make you so successful someday!

Originally Posted by *Shira*

I would have quit trying to help him after he rejected the first couple of people I referred.

I would have said, "I'm sorry, but I've already suggested the qualified dancers that I know of. Since you don't seem to want them, I'm afraid I can't help you."

Perfect!

Sandy, you are trying to be nice and help this guy out and you are handling it very well. You've done enough, he's making this your problem, and it is not. Your time is valuable too!

ita with satin and and everyone else. also, the only time i've ever been stiffed was a restaurant gig where the owner had made comments about how all the other dancers in my area weren't young/sexy enough. that should have been a clue that he didn't value this dance as real entertainment for his patrons. but i did it anyway, and only walked away with my tips.

Originally Posted by beafarhana

It's his problem, not yours, and it sounds like a complete waste of your time and emotional energy...

Yup. Total waste of my time. Whatever. Lesson learned, right?

Originally Posted by lizajuk

Why don't these people just 'fess up ( as you say) that they want someone on the cheap?

I guess even greasy f*ks have a conscience? **pardon my language**

Originally Posted by raqFariha

an event planning place around here once hired "actresses who had taken a few lessons"

+5 for honesty
-100 for being a sleazebag

Originally Posted by maurazebra

If this is the type of job he offers, and it is not the type you want, who cares? I know I keep saying this, and it may very well be more wishful-thinking than true, BUT... what you want is customers who want YOUR brand (of dancing or dancers or events or whatever), not a 'generic' bellydancer(s). The first customer will pay your price. The second one wants someone to swing by in a shiny costume for $25. So if this event is not going to enhance your brand, don't be associated with it. The local talent agency will be glad to send plenty of beautiful models in shiny costumes who will procede to try to make themselves invisible because they know they cannot really dance... it will be great entertainment!

Hmm...very good point! That's an interesting way to look at it.

Originally Posted by emtink

just popping in to say that i really appreciate how honest and candid you are, sandy. its really refreshing to have someone new to bhuz openly ask these sorts of questions and be so open to the responses from more seasoned bhuzzers.

and for admitting to greedy thoughts (cuz i have them too!) here's a money shower

Awwww thanks! I'm glad I can offer at least that. ,r:;
I'm starting to think I might lack the neurotransmitters regular people have that makes me so blunt haha.

WOOT! Cyber money!!! hee hee

Originally Posted by SatinWorship19

Sandy, you rock! I totally admire how you've stepped up to the plate and asked all these important questions. Your patient, conscientious attitude will make you so successful someday!

Thank you to YOu as well!! If not successful, at least my moral grounding is still intact. ..l;,

I am still in the n00b stage, and relishing being just a student with a reservoir for belly dance knowledge. ,r:;

Man I am getting way overboard with all these smilies. Carrara your syntax is contagious. If that makes ANY sense.....

Originally Posted by *Shira*

I would have quit trying to help him after he rejected the first couple of people I referred.

I would have said, "I'm sorry, but I've already suggested the qualified dancers that I know of. Since you don't seem to want them, I'm afraid I can't help you."

Thank you Shira, you're a step ahead of me. After much mulling over, that's what my mind arrived at before I ever called him. I was thinking, you know what, you have fingers, go google it or something.

that's sort of my line too
and then they usually go "but cant you send a student", and then i go "all the students i send out for gigs are pro-standard and charge the same".
and i hang up.

Originally Posted by *Shira*

I would have quit trying to help him after he rejected the first couple of people I referred.

I would have said, "I'm sorry, but I've already suggested the qualified dancers that I know of. Since you don't seem to want them, I'm afraid I can't help you."