Thread: Creepy email... how would you respond?

I received this email from someone who saw my website:

"Thanks for the reply. Well, I haven't seen you perform in person. I live in Gig Harbor WA. But, hopefully I can soon. I know this may sound odd, but I was just wondering if you might
consider the thought of having a full time servant boy? Like someone
to do all your daily tasks and cleaning and
stuff for you. If it's something you'd even think about, I promise I'll
work really hard and, of course, for free.And,
even if you just want to give me like a trial week or month or
whatever, just to see if it's something you'd want? And if it turns out
you don't need a servant boy, you can just send me away. But if you give
me a chance to prove myself, I know I can show you how hard I would work
to live up to any expectations you would have of me.I really hope to hear from you, even if it's just to say no.Ken"

I didn't answer this email, and then a few hours later, I received this one:

"Hi again,

I was just thinking about it, and I really hope I wasn't being too out of line with that proposal? I really wasn't trying to offend you or anything like that. I was truly being sincere though. And I mean it when I say that I would work really hard to meet any expectations you would have of me.

Again, I am so sorry if I offended you in anyway. That's the last thing in the world I would ever want to do.

Will you at least think about it though? You can ask me any questions you want or even screen me for an interview or something.

If there's anything at all I can do to have you consider it, please let me know.

Hope to hear from you."

So far I haven't answered either email... how should I respond to this, or should I not respond at all? Never had anything like this happen before. Any advice appreciated!

Add sender to blocked senders list.

Delete.

Have a good laugh about it

Originally Posted by Emma

Add sender to blocked senders list.

Delete.

Have a good laugh about it

On the other hand. How big a mess is the house?

I did a web search and find no record of a 'servant boy' scam. Although this does seem very odd, especially as he's offering to do it 'for free'. Possibly it's new?

Maybe the old adage "when in doubt, don't" might apply here.

'Sorry, I'm not in the habit of catering to the fetishes of random strangers'

People really need to keep their kinks to themselves!

I wouldn't respond to it and hope he takes the hint and goes away on his own. Even if you politely tell him you're not interested, someone who's looking for a submissive thrill might find that to be encouraging in an odd way. If things escalate--if he seems to be getting angrier about not getting your attention or acquiescence to his propositions (which I wouldn't expect, considering the request, but...), I would treat this like any other stalker situation: keep good records of his correspondence, tell others, don't put yourself in places where you're physically vulnerable and without help, etc. Depending on where you live, the police may not be able to get involved until something happens, but at this point, he hasn't done anything to make you suspect he's anything but a harmless guy with poor game and no awareness of Craigslist.

BTW, it looks like this thread is visible from the Internet without signing on as a Bhuz member.

I dont think its a scam, but rather someone with a fetish and lack of social skills. Back in my goth-club days, there was a guy there who was always very nice, and who always dressed as a cowboy. One time he quite seriously asked my BF if he could come and mow the lawn for us, while wearing a French maid outfit (and no, it wasnt a joke). Because it was someone we at least knew in passing, it was easy to politely decline and move on.

I am torn here as to weather I would ignore the email (most likely) or briefly and politely decline.

Originally Posted by NazirahDances

I dont think its a scam, but rather someone with a fetish and lack of social skills. Back in my goth-club days, there was a guy there who was always very nice, and who always dressed as a cowboy. One time he quite seriously asked my BF if he could come and mow the lawn for us, while wearing a French maid outfit (and no, it wasnt a joke). Because it was someone we at least knew in passing, it was easy to politely decline and move on.

I am torn here as to weather I would ignore the email (most likely) or briefly and politely decline.

I think you should ignore it. Responding is a form of attention and this is clearly attention seeking behavior (understatement).

Thanks everyone... I haven't heard anything since Friday night and haven't responded, so I think not responding is the right choice .

Ha! Serving boy, that is hilarious. Ok, creepy too.
I had one contact me with this message once:
"If a 17-year old strapping 220 lb boy offered to carry you and your swords across the desert on his back, would you accept?"


Chuckle and delete.

Don't reply. Serves no useful purpose whatsoever.

One of my friends (a fairly famous dancer) got a message that was almost exactly the same (but not copy-and-paste same) a couple of weeks ago.

I wouldn't respond to that.

This is the first time I've ever heard of bellydance being associated with lifestyle BDSM ... although it's weird, I have to admit, I'm jealous that no one is begging ME for the honor of being my servant!

Seriously, take care and good luck.

Having belly danced, in a cage, at a Goth club (I was young!), and been asked to teach Belly Dance in a Dungeon to a bunch of Subs, the association between belly dance and BDSM doesn't surprise me at all.

I agree with don't respond. Do keep the e-mail in case anything escalates so that you have a paper trail. We've had more than on stalker around here.

{{{HUGS}}}

This guy apparently doesn't realize there are websites out there that are great for those looking for BDSM related activities. Emailing your local bellydancer is not one of them.

I hope he finds what he's looking for and leaves you alone.

Did you hear from him again? I'm curious as to whether he was really interested enough to follow it up.

I had what was undoubtably a wierd phone call once: A guy rang and asked if I did anniversary celebrations. I said sure, and asked whether it was for a restaurant function, or a party at a home. He said in his home. I asked for how many people, he said two. Two? I asked if he knew that he had called a belly dancer and not a dancer of another type, he said, he was sure as he and his partner usually got a belly dancer to dance for them on their anniversary, but she was away overseas! I replied quite honestly and said I did not do that kind of function and no reputable dancer would either. He actually sounded quite offended and hung up! I wish I had asked for the name of the dancer who "normally" does this yearly gig!

Don't that take the cake? We work so hard to dispell the erroneous beliefs that are in society and someone comes along and blows it!
Shimmying the creepiness away...
Charni
Belly Dance Lessons Online - Home

Ignore. Block. Delete. Any response could be considered 'feeding into his scam'. A confused mind might consider any response encouragement.

Originally Posted by jewelsdances

I received this email from someone who saw my website:

"Thanks for the reply. Well, I haven't seen you perform in person. I live in Gig Harbor WA. But, hopefully I can soon. I know this may sound odd, but I was just wondering if you might
consider the thought of having a full time servant boy? Like someone
to do all your daily tasks and cleaning and
stuff for you. If it's something you'd even think about, I promise I'll
work really hard and, of course, for free.And,
even if you just want to give me like a trial week or month or
whatever, just to see if it's something you'd want? And if it turns out
you don't need a servant boy, you can just send me away. But if you give
me a chance to prove myself, I know I can show you how hard I would work
to live up to any expectations you would have of me.I really hope to hear from you, even if it's just to say no.Ken"

I didn't answer this email, and then a few hours later, I received this one:

"Hi again,

I was just thinking about it, and I really hope I wasn't being too out of line with that proposal? I really wasn't trying to offend you or anything like that. I was truly being sincere though. And I mean it when I say that I would work really hard to meet any expectations you would have of me.

Again, I am so sorry if I offended you in anyway. That's the last thing in the world I would ever want to do.

Will you at least think about it though? You can ask me any questions you want or even screen me for an interview or something.

If there's anything at all I can do to have you consider it, please let me know.

Hope to hear from you."

So far I haven't answered either email... how should I respond to this, or should I not respond at all? Never had anything like this happen before. Any advice appreciated!

this is all lingo from the S & M world . he has a fetish.

..just say you are "vanilla" and he will leave.

Originally Posted by showtime

Ignore. Block. Delete. Any response could be considered 'feeding into his scam'. A confused mind might consider any response encouragement.

This.