Thread: What do you do when the tips dry up?

I do agree money showers look great, but there is a very practical reason american dancers have encouraged getting tipped in the costume.

For people considering this, be prepared to walk away without all your money. I can tell you from experience that it really sucks to be eyeballing a hundred bucks on the floor that you know the customers wanted you to have - only to realize that it will all end up in someone else's pocket. Either the band or the maitre d'....

It's not realistic to expect that waitstaff in a restaurant, who usually are not making much base salary themselves, won't keep part of the tips. Yes, you can 'tip them out' as a hopeful bribe, but it's rather tempting when said waiter knows there is no way they can get caught...oh no, wait! I'm just being paranoid: dancers are always treated well by the staff & owners of venues hahh hah ha...

If you have a squad of dedicated students and can find a flunky (er, 'assistant' lol) to squat around the floor and pick them all up, great. But for most dancers it is just not realistic, especially because once you have got a place trained to do money showers you can't go back to the old way on just the odd nights there is nobody to collect for you.

Originally Posted by CFerhat

I don't know if this is a Midwest thing, but I think a lot of people are uncomfortable with body tipping. I've spoken to some who like the dancer very much and feel it's somehow disrespectful to the dancer to touch her. And then money showers can feel show-offy - "look at me get up on stage and show how much money I'm tipping the dancer." So alternatives as mentioned above I think would be worth a try.

Exactly. In western culture the only time you "tip" a dancer is at a strip joint. No one tips a Ballet dancer or a rock band.

Folks just don't know that it's appropriate practice in the middle east to tip a bellydancer and musicians.

Well that's funny. I live in the same town as TH & Yeli and this last Friday, for the first time ever, I made zero in tips at one of my regular restaurants. Which is funny because MY FAMILY was in the audience to see me dance for the first time ever!!!!! ..l;, I was so worried about other aspects of the evening, concentrating on my performance, etc., that I completely forgot to explain to them about tipping!!! Not that they would have needed to tip me, but they could have tipped the other dancer. And of course none of the other Americans in the audience figured it out on their own. Fortunately there was a Turkish wedding the next night and things went back to normal.

One more cultural thing I've noticed - when I've been in Morocco, for example, my husband would tip the singer to have them sing a verse about someone in our party. I'd tip a dancer and ask her to go dance with someone. It seems the tip is more often used to ask a favor of the performer, rather than simply as a thank you for a regular set.
Christine

Originally Posted by HubicRuzz

Exactly. In western culture the only time you "tip" a dancer is at a strip joint. No one tips a Ballet dancer or a rock band.

Folks just don't know that it's appropriate practice in the middle east to tip a bellydancer and musicians.

I get your point, but, at least in my experience, if you at least have seed money, a lot of people will see that and ask. I also think that there are more people than you think that have seen a bellydancer, at least one other time, and are familiar with the tipping concept. Besides, a body tip can be a fun part of the customer/dancer interaction. I do understand some people's hesitation at taking them, I was uncomfortable with it as well, until I actually took a tip this way. It can be all in good fun and be an opportunity to get a few laughs and smiles from a table. Ok, back to the topic of tips drying up...

people do tip musicians in rock bands. I have seen it done at American weddings, etc. We also tip strolling violinists in fancy restaurants. We also tip non-strolling musicians in lounges (brandy snifter, anyone?).

as far as the idea that the only time westerner tip a dancer is in a strip joint, it is also the case that the only time many westerners SEE a dancer (upclose) is in a strip joint. In fact, if a professional dancer is performing & there is no fourth wall, I don't think it is inappropriate to tip.

Example - Buskers on Venice Beach who are neither strippers nor belly dancers, yet they get tipped. Tap dancers in the old days. They got tipped. Taxi-dancers in the 1930s. They got tipped.

I do'nt think it's accurate to always be conflating "tips == stripper" why not move past that to reframe it as "dancer == time to tip"?

Originally Posted by deelight

Well that's funny. I live in the same town as TH & Yeli and this last Friday, for the first time ever, I made zero in tips at one of my regular restaurants. Which is funny because MY FAMILY was in the audience to see me dance for the first time ever!!!!! ..l;, I was so worried about other aspects of the evening, concentrating on my performance, etc., that I completely forgot to explain to them about tipping!!! Not that they would have needed to tip me, but they could have tipped the other dancer. And of course none of the other Americans in the audience figured it out on their own. Fortunately there was a Turkish wedding the next night and things went back to normal.

Heh, the best tips I've made were at a Turkish birthday party...

Originally Posted by rachelw

I also think over the past few years, people have stopped carrying cash very often and they go out and think "Oh, darn, I'd love to give that girl a tip, but I forgot to go to the ATM." Now, it's rare to find even a local hole-in-the-wall coffee shop that doesn't take plastic. I know I personally carry cash a lot less, but if I know I'm going to be some place with performers, or in a crowded bar where I don't want to leave a tab, I get cash.

Yes. I think this has happened to me at the silliest of places (the Sonic Drive-In, yes, I'm busted here..hahahaha). I often don't have the cash on me but use my atm/credit card. They don't let me leave a tip on my card. grrrrrr.

I love showering the dancer with money!

I have had a similar problem at the establishment I usually dance at. The crowd has gotten younger, 18- 21. This age segment orders just a hookah or two and drinks. They barely bring enough for the check let alone the dancer. At times, they do tip the dancer so I have after a lot of no tipping nights come away with $1.

Has anyone else noticed this trend?

Originally Posted by daphnec

I have had a similar problem at the establishment I usually dance at. The crowd has gotten younger, 18- 21. This age segment orders just a hookah or two and drinks. They barely bring enough for the check let alone the dancer. At times, they do tip the dancer so I have after a lot of no tipping nights come away with $1.

Has anyone else noticed this trend?

I think that this is definitely part of the problem, as well as the move to a cashless society. People just don't have the cash to tip anymore!

There has got to be a workaround - one of the establishments in town adds a $1 per person per table "entertainment fee" on the nights he has dancers. I wonder if our restaurant would consider instituting such a thing and then raising all the dancers' pay to the level that tips were not such a huge consideration? OR perhaps there could be a way for the restaurant to add tips onto the patron's bill (if all they are carrying is plastic) and then bring them the ones to tip with?

Wow, it would be so much fun to get a money shower....it doesn't happen in Ireland because our smallest bill is the 5 euro note (which is what, 7 dollars?) so, won't exactly be getting showered with those....
I suppose my friends in the UK have the same problem, since the smallest note there is the 5 pound note (10 dollars)
We have coins for smaller denominations...thick heavy knock-you-out-when- they-hit-you-on-the-head-coins so no money showers happening for me!

Originally Posted by tamrahennatx

OR perhaps there could be a way for the restaurant to add tips onto the patron's bill (if all they are carrying is plastic) and then bring them the ones to tip with?

That is EXACTLY what I've always hoped for! There have been a few times where I came without cash on me and I've always thought there has to be a way for patrons to add this on to their bill. You usually receive the bill right before you leave, however.

What if your patrons had a tip "order form" that they could place on the edge of the table...the waitress could pick it up, add $x to their bill and return with dollars so they have time to tip while the show is going on. Do you think that would be too complicated? Or is that also too straightforward? I don't know, this was a total stream of consciousness thing ..l;,

Here in the Netherlands I've noticed the same about tipps drying up (not only for dancers, also for musicians according to my sweety who is an Arab musician). Plus we now have the Euro as a currency and the smallest bill is €5 which equals $7.5. So that makes people even more restrained to tip..

B

good point about people not carrying cash anymore.

yeah, the money shower thing looks nice, but after everyone takes their cut, the dancer hardly gets a thing. especially if the collectors have sticky fingers.

if the establishments would just pay us what we are worth, we wouldn't have to worry about tips!

I know I've gone to restaurants with just my debit card and then I feel awful not having cash to tip the dancer. It would be great to be able to add the tip to the bill, although not as much fun as tipping.

Careful about adding tips to the bill. Some dancers have been known not to get said tip.....

this has happened to me many times. I am no longer at said place that it has happened.

My tips were basically stolen, and I'm talking, $20 left on the ticket for me.
Not a buck, even though that would be wrong too.

How do I know? Customers told me they left a tip,
me: Table such and such left me a tip
restaruant: no they didnt,
or last time we were in, we left you $20 on the bill, did you get it.
me: Ummm......

When I see a crowd of young people, 99% of the time I know I'm walking away with $1 in tips if I'm lucky.

Originally Posted by *maria*

When I see a crowd of young people, 99% of the time I know I'm walking away with $1 in tips if I'm lucky.

Oh, tell me about it! I'd rather dance for a middle-aged/older crowd any day of the week than dance for twenty-somethings. They either don't have the cash, or they sure as heck aren't going to give it to you when they could be buying that hot girl at the bar a drink.

That, and I've noticed younger guys who are at the club with their girlfriends won't tip because their chicks will get mad.

Sometimes girls will tip me, but they usually want to get up and show off how sexy they are too. I've had a couple of drunk girls be asked to leave the stage by security because they don't know how to comport themselves with dignity while tipping.

Originally Posted by *maria*

Careful about adding tips to the bill. Some dancers have been known not to get said tip.....

this has happened to me many times. I am no longer at said place that it has happened.

My tips were basically stolen, and I'm talking, $20 left on the ticket for me.
Not a buck, even though that would be wrong too.

How do I know? Customers told me they left a tip,
me: Table such and such left me a tip
restaruant: no they didnt,
or last time we were in, we left you $20 on the bill, did you get it.
me: Ummm......

I think in this case, the money added to the bill should be brought in cash and the dancer tipped right then, and not added to be sorted out later at the end of the night. You'd be waiting forever to get your tips and since we're not there when they count the receipts, there'd be no way for us to know what we were tipped.

There IS an ATM machine at the club where I dance, so people COULD get cash out if they wanted to.

Originally Posted by tamrahennatx

Oh, tell me about it! I'd rather dance for a middle-aged/older crowd any day of the week than dance for twenty-somethings. They either don't have the cash, or they sure as heck aren't going to give it to you when they could be buying that hot girl at the bar a drink.

That, and I've noticed younger guys who are at the club with their girlfriends won't tip because their chicks will get mad.

Sometimes girls will tip me, but they usually want to get up and show off how sexy they are too. I've had a couple of drunk girls be asked to leave the stage by security because they don't know how to comport themselves with dignity while tipping.

HELLO! What is UP with the women, mostly young girls who try to tip you in your bust, or somewhere else inappropriate? They are usually with their dates too.

I think it's a product of the "girls gone wild" generation,

signed,
crotchety old geezer

Originally Posted by sabrinabellydancer

good point about people not carrying cash anymore.

yeah, the money shower thing looks nice, but after everyone takes their cut, the dancer hardly gets a thing. especially if the collectors have sticky fingers.

if the establishments would just pay us what we are worth, we wouldn't have to worry about tips!

At the club where I dance, NO ONE gets a cut of the tips, except the other dancers if we dance at the same time. Sometimes, if we do well, we give the guy who picks up our tips some cash, but tips haven't been that good in a long time.

They are also very trustworthy, and it's very few and far between that I've ever had tips disappear. The patrons are more likely to pick them up off the floor before they are collected than the staff is to have sticky fingers. They also collect veils and any costume items that might have come off during performance (headbands, cuffs, earrings). I also usually have a security guy with me on each stage that I can hand my tips, veil, or finger cymbals to during performance, so I don't have to worry about them walking off after I discard them (it's so cute to see this big burly guy standing in the corner holding bright silk and clacking finger cymbals together while I dance!) Our guys are awesome and we love them.

You have a really nice place to dance - we just have your typical restaurants where you are dancing between tables. Security guys and a stage? That's a dream out here.
My security guy at the other place I danced at for years that closed was my close friend and maitre-d Reduoan.
Tiny little guy, but would stand there and protect us if customers got drunk and unruly.

Originally Posted by *maria*

You have a really nice place to dance - we just have your typical restaurants where you are dancing between tables. Security guys and a stage? That's a dream out here.
My security guy at the other place I danced at for years that closed was my close friend and maitre-d Reduoan.
Tiny little guy, but would stand there and protect us if customers got drunk and unruly.

For restaurant/club work, it is one of the best places to work in general. We still have our issues with pay being what we feel it should be, but honestly it's a great place to work all in all. We have a real dressing room that's only used by the dancers with a private bathroom (well private to the staff at the restaurant and not patrons), the restaurant always pays us (though we get paid a week behind, like a paycheck), and it's been a steady gig. There are drawbacks and frustrations, but all in all it's the best place I've worked, which is why I've been there for five years.