Thread: Re-locating Ethics

So, hypothetically, if a dancer wanted to relocate to another town, perhaps one with a smaller dance community than the one she currently lives in, and wants to keep performing and teaching, how does she do it without stepping on any established toes? Any tips, experiences, advice from either side of that one?

I'm not sure about relocating. But it's something we're considering in the next couple of years. And I really want to keep performing and teaching, and I really, really don't want to ruffle any feathers. I come in peace!

- Leela

I am relocating to London. One of the first things I have done was go to a festival in the UK, introduce myself and start getting to know some of hte local dancers and teachers. So far I have been told that I am welcome.

When I moved to Lincoln, NE, on the other hand, it was a mixed bag. The tribal dancers all welcomed me with open arms. The cab dancers, not so much. And short of taking lots of classes with them, there was nothign which I could have done to change that.

{{{HUGS}}}

When a much-more-experienced-than-me dancer relocated to my town, she handled it really well.

She e-mailed me and introduced herself and asked if we could meet for lunch sometime. To be honest, it took me a few hours to fully process the info (I had my little turf all to myself for years) and be ready to respond to her. So I was glad she e-mailed instead of calling me on the phone!!

We met for lunch and she wanted to know where she could teach that wouldn't be stepping on my toes. She went over a list of possibilities she'd assembled and I was able to say "I've talked to them, don't bother... yes, that would be good... no, I'm communicating with them right now..etc" which was great for BOTH of us. She asked about the local dance community and we talked about working together to set up a regular restaurant gig for ourselves and high-level students.

We talked about working together to sponsor haflas and things (which I wasn't doing on my own) and being able to generate some excitement and build a community. We did work together to create one hafla, in fact. And I included her in my student shows.

But in the end, her job wound up preventing her from really teaching, and after a few years she moved away again.

Anyway, I always thought she handled the whole thing beautifully. There are two other teachers on my 'turf' now but neither has ever tried to communicate with me about working together (and neither one participates in the regional dance community) so I don't know much about them.

When I moved to my current location, I contacted all of the local teachers by email to introduce myself and let them know I was interested in meeting each of them. Once I moved, I attended all of the local dance events, met for lunch with some of the local dancers, and held off on teaching for a while to get accustomed to the community and to be involved. It was (and still is) my view that it is best to learn the new community and let everyone know what you are about without doing anything drastic at once. I danced in the local showcases and then filled in for one of the local teachers when she was on maternity leave. After about a year of involvement in the community, performing, and learning the surroundings, I started teaching classes again.

I think it worked out for the best for me because I was able to spend that time gaining a greater understanding of the dance community here and getting to know some fantastic dancers. I am back to teaching 4 classes a week now and starting a troupe again and I feel like I am an accepted member of the community.

It can be hard to move to a new location, but it can also be really rewarding if you look at it as a great chance to meet and become involved with an existing dance community! :)

Good luck! If you want to chat, feel free to send me an email :)

Those are great ideas. Contacting the local dancers to try to build a positive relationship, learn which places are already established by dancers, learn the local rates. It will also give you a good idea of who might not be so receptive to the idea of having a positive relationship. :(
...plus you never know- where you're moving to might hold a lovely Bhuzzer- so post here, too.

I am going through this right now, as I'm moving from Seattle to Houston in a couple weeks.

I've made several virtual contacts via email and tribe, and my experience thus far has been really good. The dancers I've talked to seem to be very nice and informative.

What has been difficult, at least from afar, is feeling out the community. But I figure there's only so much research I can do online.

If anyone here has gone through this before, it would be great to get some dos and donts!

Having relocated from Vegas to Denver and back to Vegas - getting into the community can be scary. Not wanting to step on anyones toes is always in the forefront. Communication is the key. Make inquires about the area...call up the Mid East restaurants and find out who dances there and find out how to contact them. Call studios, colleges, rec centers and such and get the 411 on the teachers. Find out what festivals, events, shows and such happen in that area and who is doing them. Email, snail mail, call, visit....keep in constant contact.

Once your moved...I suggest an open house. Set a date, fluff up the pillows, bring out the hummus and get all your contacts together for a networking mixer. My husband does these alot and they work really well.

I think you'll be surprised by just how many dancers will be truly happy and excited to have you as an addition to their community.

Thanks for asking that question, Flimflamgirl! I am in graduate school, and know I will be moving in a few years, and those thoughts had crossed my mind.

The responses are really helpful, thanks!

I've not done this myself since I was 17, but I've known a few people who have. The ones that worked used a little patience, humility, and plenty of observation/reaching out.

What I mean, in part, is even if you think you're coming from a "big" community to a "smaller" community...don't start with that assumption until you're *really* sure you understand the specific dance community you're moving to. The size of the city/metro and/or the number of regionally or nationally marketed dancers living there doesn't necessarily tell you how large or high-quality the community is. It *could* be more well-established than you think. It may also have its own prevailing style and aesthetic and its own "star dancers" (you may not have heard of them...and they may not have heard of you.) So, taking the time to get to know these people and to adjust to the general expectations (e.g. if go see what kind of costume, hair, makeup, show structure, dance styles, tipping practices, etc. seem to be the norm in restaurants if you want restaurant gigs, etc.) helps.

The advice about feeling out other dancers in town/trying to meet people is great. Don't be shy about who you are/what you've done, but rather than lead off with your resume, try starting by inquiring about them/their area community. Then let them get interested in you. And then there's the patience thing--so much in this biz is timing, and it can take a while to get all the pieces in place. For example, you may be the best restaurant dancer ever, but if Restaurant A already has a full rotation of dancers who they really like and who are popular with their customers and they don't want to upset that balance, they may not hire you right away. You may have to wait for something to change and/or start out on a sub list like a "new" dancer. (...In some ways, though, that's good, if the owner doesn't just screw existing good dancers to nab the "hot new thing.")

I live in what some coastal peeps consider a "flyover" state, but it actually *does* have a large and sophisticated M.E. dance community. Based on observation, I can say that one of the things that rubs some in these kinds of communities the wrong way is the idea of a gal who thinks she's from a "bigger" community coming into town to scope things out for her career, but not bothering to find out about the scene already in place. If you add to that said dancer assumes that that since she is/was a working dancer in her big hometown, she is a probably better than those already working here and could get hired wherever she wants.... Not a good recipie.

All that said, though, I know some people who have transitioned WONDERFULLY and who have thrived in a new town. It can be rewarding and invigorating, if you approach it well and if it works out right!

Thanks, everyone! This is so helpful. See, I'm not a dancer only; if my husband and I moved it would be more for our lives as artists (I'm an illustrator and painter, we're both cartoonists, and I currently have a lot of work in that area). I certainly will not underestimate the local scene where I'm thinking of - though it seems sleepy in terms of restaurant work, I know there are people teaching and working down there. They seem nice, and my goal is really to make friends and be a part of whatever dance community there is, as I am where I live now. It's less about money and working, than it is about continuing to train and to do this thing I love so much.

It's all so hypothetical right now. But it's an important factor in whether I can bear to make the move - if I had to stop dancing I'd wither away. Definitely, if I do this, I'll make sure to do all these things advised, and will tell you guys all about it.

- Leela

Oh wow, Leela! I do understand what you're saying. A few years back my husband was up for a position that, if he'd taken it and if I'd relocated with him (the initial contract would have been for nine months during which I'd have probably stayed behind but then we'd have known by about 6 months in if he was staying....), it would have resulted in us moving to a small town in western Massachusettes. I went through a lot of these same thought processes and worries and threw myself into trying to find out everything I could about what my options would be in the area to keep studying and hopefully performing and teaching. Then there were also considerations like moving further away from aging parents and some things he was involved in locally.... He wound up ultimately taking a position here, but it was certainly a wild thing to contemplate, even in the theoretical stage.

Best of luck to you, and let us know what happens!

Originally Posted by rose_sahar

Thanks for asking that question, Flimflamgirl! I am in graduate school, and know I will be moving in a few years, and those thoughts had crossed my mind.

The responses are really helpful, thanks!

*ahem*

MOVE TO VEGAS!!!

very timely. hubby and i want to move to AZ. i *think* there are bders where we want to move but haven't found website info. i have wondered about how i would deal with the natives. tina

Tina pm me if you want the scoop on the dance scene in phx,tempe,scottsdale etc,....

Originally Posted by tattood1

very timely. hubby and i want to move to AZ. i *think* there are bders where we want to move but haven't found website info. i have wondered about how i would deal with the natives. tina

If your heading down further south like Yuma or Tucson I might be able to put you in touch with a few Tucson dancers, here in Yuma, not a problem :D Just ask away

i'm looking at the tri-state area. kingman to the river. THX, tina

Originally Posted by yasmindiab

*ahem*

MOVE TO VEGAS!!!

ROFL...Yasmin, you beat me to it.

Thanks for the animated gif hugs...if we did move, it would be a happy one. Just an odd one! I'm getting kind of tired of being in New York, which surprises me - I thought we'd stay here forever. It's changed a lot since we moved back here 8 years ago, and of course since I was a kid here. It always changes, but it's become like a big mall, punctuated by condos, and full of too many shrieking college students (do I sound like a curmudgeon?). I've been pining for Gainesville ever since we spent a long block of time there recently. So quiet. So peaceful. I finally understand why people who didn't grow up in NY find it so overwhelming - everybody here is always yelling and ranting and yammering. Lately I sorta feel like I'm surrounded by human jackhammers all the time. Just want to see fewer people in the course of a day, ride a bike (I don't bike in NY; I'm not suicidal), and commune with more nature than Prospect Park can offer me. But, the bellydance scene here is packed, which is a good thing - you can always guarantee a good time. I'd just want to make sure the same thing exists down there. And I can see that it does, to some extent - there are quite a few established professionals down there who I'm sure would be great to learn from. Fantasizing about growing my own lemons and rosemary...trying to keep from looking at Gainesville real estate websites....lemons....rosemary....peace...quiet...

Ahem. Anyway. Pardon my meandering. I'm so glad I posted this question. I think it's really important to do things like this carefully and in a community-oriented way.

- Leela

Originally Posted by Samira_dncr

ROFL...Yasmin, you beat me to it.

well, ms Rose_Sahar is one of my bestest friends in the universe. :)

I'm trying to talk her into at LEAST coming to the intensive....


but seriously...flimflamgirl, you are SO welcome to move out here! We have a great community! :)

This is an absolutely wonderful topic, as I'm sure many of us are in our "moving years" or may find ourselves in such a situation. Having just returned from a sojourn in an area where ME dance was scarce... wow. what a chance to learn more about myself is all I can say. I learned that when it's not a part of my life I am not happy!

We'll probably be moving like ten times in the next ten years all over the states, so I'll keep this thread handy. :)

In thinking about it one thing I'd do if moving would be to take classes in the area with local "master teachers". You'd get a really good idea of the level of dance in the area, hone up your skills (always a good thing, I'm a perpetual student) as well as meet other high level dancers in the area.

The issue I found, and which in smaller communities you may need to be careful about, is that there can be a lot of politics amoung the local extablishment. This can lead to all kinds of problems for the new comer. I am not sure how to avoid those kind of things, or if it is even possible.

But this is why I have and will continue to meet and try to better understand the community I am going into.

{{{HUGS}}}

There has already been lots of good advice on this thread. I'll try to avoid being too redundant.

This has already been mentioned, but it bears repeating: Avoid the temptation to think that just because you come from a bigger city, you somehow had better instruction or higher quality dancing than dancers in smaller communities. Big cities can have poor teachers/dancers. Small communities can have wonderful ones. Since moving to the Midwest, I've seen some fabulous dancing in unexpected places.

I know of a different dancer (not me) who moved from a big city to a much smaller dance community, and entered the new community with kind of an "I'm better than everyone because I come from a big city and I studied with big-name dance stars," chip on her shoulder, quickly alienating several locals. I heard about this from the alienated locals who thought she was a legend in her own mind.

I relocated in 2004 from the San Francisco Bay Area to Iowa. The locals here made me feel very welcome. If you approach your relationship to the locals, as you meet them, with the mind set that you're looking for friends, not rivals, it'll help you settle in. You can do stuff like volunteer to help at events they're sponsoring, invite them to a video party at your home, go out for coffee with each of them individually, patronize the restaurants where they're performing, etc.

When I first moved here, I waited 6 months before starting to teach a local class. (I did, however, teach one that was an hour's drive away.) I've always been careful to avoid putting my flyers/posters in stores where the other primary local dancer puts hers. There are plenty of other places I can advertise, so I don't need to invade the spots where she has already established herself. I sought a restaurant gig for myself that was at a different restaurant from the one she was working at - a restaurant that didn't have any dancing at all prior to my approaching them. The restaurant that I work with only uses a dancer intermittently, but that's the kind of gig I want right now. I don't want to be tied down with a weekly obligation at this time.

Shira - Thanks so much for commenting. Your comments reflect exactly my reasons for asking about this in the first place. I wouldn't want to seem like I'm swanning in like a big diva if we move to a new place. I just want to be part of a dance community wherever I am, and since I've spent most of my life in New York, I'm know next to nothing about other places. I'm so not a diva, if I tried to act like one I'd fail miserably and comically. I love the idea of hosting a video party. If we do relocate, I'm totally going to do that.

- Leela

Yes, and thank-you everyone for pointing out that smaller communities are not necessarily poorly served! It's something that crops up here once in a while.

I'm in Bangor, ME. Yes, we're the middle of nowhere. But, guess what? For the last 8 years I've sponsored an internationally known teacher every Labor Day weekend, so the dancers here have all worked with Morocco, Artemis, Amaya, Mesmera, Hadia and more. A teacher a few hours away in Canada also sponsors workshops; I've studied there with Bozenka and Aziza. Plus my own travels to NYC. So, when someone from 'away' gets here and makes assumptions, it raises a LOT of local hackles.

Kitty

Yes. My original question wasn't about smaller places being under-served, it was just about how to ethically relocate when one is a professional as well as a student - all the advice given here could hold for moving from a smaller to a larger community, too, I'm sure. Since the place I'm thinking of moving to is Gainesville, Florida, I can say with confidence that it is not under-served at all!

Originally Posted by flimflamgirl

Yes. My original question wasn't about smaller places being under-served, it was just about how to ethically relocate when one is a professional as well as a student - all the advice given here could hold for moving from a smaller to a larger community, too, I'm sure. Since the place I'm thinking of moving to is Gainesville, Florida, I can say with confidence that it is not under-served at all!

Oh you'll like it! Gainesville is a lovely community of dancers :)

Yasmin and Samira, don't think I haven't thought about it!! In fact, I am thinking about it right now!

Mahsati, tell me more! Last time I was there, it was over the holiday season, and there wasn't a whole lot going on anywhere (not just dance-wise - in general). But I've done some research, and I can see that there are plenty of dancers there. And it seems like Florida overall has a good scene.

- Leela

Originally Posted by flimflamgirl

Mahsati, tell me more! Last time I was there, it was over the holiday season, and there wasn't a whole lot going on anywhere (not just dance-wise - in general). But I've done some research, and I can see that there are plenty of dancers there. And it seems like Florida overall has a good scene.

- Leela

Oh it does! Florida has a wonderful scene. There are more or less performance opportunities depending on you location. The big ones being Orlando, Tampa, and Miami - I danced and lived in Tampa for about 10 years. In Gainesville, you are centrally located to get to dance events in the Tallahassee area (approx 2.5 hours), north Florida - Jacksonville (approx 1.5 hours), Orlando (approx. 1.5 hours), Tampa (approx 2 hours) - the only place that will be fairly far is Miami.....but Miami is far from everywhere in Florida! If you want, drop me an email and I can give you details and contact information for the dancers I know in the different areas. I also am a native of Florida (about 60 miles north of Gainesville) then did my undergraduate degree in Gainesville before I moved to Tampa, so if you have any general Florida questions - feel free to ask! ..g.: