[Zana]

I recently had a package go astray twice on its way from the US to Canada, a trip that should have taken no more than ten days. The first time it came back to me marked "insufficient postage," even though the post office clerk calculated the postage when I mailed it. I repackaged it and mailed it again weeks ago, but the buyer has still not received it and I fear it's gone for good. (Still keeping my fingers crossed: if anyone sees a little burgundy abaya with pink embroidery wandering around Ontario, speaking only Arabic and looking lost and forlorn, please PM me.)

In this situation I feel responsible -- and guilty -- because I did not buy insurance or tracking as I usually do when I mailed it the second time. I was in a hurry to send it out again after the initial delay, and in the back of my mind I illogically thought "what are the chances of there being a problem twice?" The buyer has been nothing but sweet and patient about it, but given the circumstances I've refunded her payment. It seemed like the right thing to do in this situation, and I trust her to pay me again if the item does show up eventually.

But this was a relatively small thing, an abaya, not an expensive costume -- I wouldn't be able to cough up the money for a big-ticket item even if I wanted to! But I'd also feel terrible if the other person got stuck for it. I prefer that the buyer pay a sufficient amount for shipping to cover insurance and tracking, since chances are I paid it myself when I bought the item. If that's not possible, though, I'd much rather pay a little more up front than have either of us be out a really significant sum or end up wrangling about it for weeks afterward.