Thanks, Shahrzad! I saw your site in Brian's gallery and immediately gravitated toward his unique eye for "magic." The color scheme of your site is delicious and so are all of the "glow-y" design motifs. He's the MAN!
What everyone else said. Visually lovely. You are very photogenic and made good use of your images throughout.
Cause I know from experience that new sites take some tweaking, so here are some things I noticed. I have a 19" monitor and am still having problems seeing everything without scrolling horizontally. I know that pale blue, violet, and gray font colors are really in right now, but they can be difficult to read in some lighting. Right now we are fine tuning a new site at work and that was one comment that many of our testers noted.
As others have noted, it might be a good idea to keep Twitter and blogs off a site that is clearly aimed at attracting clients for your services and educating them about the experience of hiring a dancer. You want your world as dancer to be somewhat mysterious and exlusive, so letting your potential audiece see you talking about more mundane issues bursts that bubble. Be careful about using too much "belly dancer talk". Like referring to a gram as dance and dash. Could this be misconstrued by a client that you aren't going to be serious about the gig? That you are going to rush in from your last gig, dance quickly and rush right out.
I'm not sure about listing the names of instructors you have taken classes, lessons, and workshops from. Other dancers will know who these teachers are but the general public will have no idea. Same with costume designers names. You don't want to leave the customer confused with too many names. You want them to remember YOUR name. You can that you have studied with some of the best known teachers in middle eastern dance. And that your costumes come from some of the top designers in Cairo.
In your gallery you might include photos in folkloric costume and/or cabaret style dress. Yes, I know you love the sleek two piece lycra stuff. But you may have potential clients who would prefer a more covered look and seeing a picture of you in that type of costume would be reassuring to them. You look lovely in your beautiful costumes and adding a photo or two in a dress might help.
I like the fact that you described the kinds of shows you can do and prices. I would leave out the comment about buying flip flops at WalMart, however. We know what you mean, but it could be taken as insulting by some potential customers.
Hope you don't mind me being a devil's advocate. I am a writer and editor by trade. The red pencil is always in my hand. (And the blue pencil is in my other hand!)
This is all great constructive feedback, Souzan. I've already excised a couple of redundant phrases and toned down some of the superlatives. It's all a work in progress. I'll get there, eventually
English major, here, so I know that red pen feeling. But why is it that it's always easier to edit somebody else's work than it is your own?
Just to preface, I have a really boring, self-made website compared to yours, and I also think that we have different types of "average client. Graphically, I think the site is phenomenal, and I love that you have PDF downloadable contracts! But there's a few thing about the copy that kind of jumped out at me, so I hope you don't mind my $0.02.
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Originally Posted by Souzan
As others have noted, it might be a good idea to keep Twitter and blogs off a site that is clearly aimed at attracting clients for your services and educating them about the experience of hiring a dancer. You want your world as dancer to be somewhat mysterious and exlusive, so letting your potential audiece see you talking about more mundane issues bursts that bubble.
I very much agree with this. I would echo the poster who said maybe you could have two Twitter accounts? I would want to see a Belly Dancer that I was about to hire tweeting about the glamorous party she's on the way to perform at, or the darling little girls she got up to dance with her at a wedding, etc. In other words, I'd want to do tweets that were completely "in character", if that makes any sense.
Just a couple of other devil's advocate thoughts:
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Can I arrange for a meetup before our show?
In an ideal world, I’d meet with every client prior to booking a show. Due to my tight schedule, however, I currently limit face-to-face meetings only to large corporate clients, media professionals, select promotional appearances (i.e. film premieres, book signings), and wedding planners.
To me, this says, "I only meet with IMPORTANT people. The rest of you peons will just have to wait until I show up at the gig to meet me." For some clients, the $230 BellyGram may be a real budget-stretcher for them, but they're scraping it together to make their party as awesome as it cam be.
I would personally either not mention it at all, or keep it vague like, "It is rare that I have the availability for a face-to-face meeting prior to the event, but requests for such are considered on a case-by-case basis."
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What if you have to cancel?
Please take comfort in the fact that I won’t cancel a paying gig unless I become seriously ill or an emergency comes up (i.e. a car accident, a death in the family, etc). In fact, I can proudly say that I have never had to cancel on a client in the three years that I have been performing.
This is a little TMI for me. I think that most clients who hire any type of entertainment understand that you're supposed to be there unless something catastrophic happens. I'd leave it for the contract details and not even put the thought in their heads. If it must be brought up, maybe something vague like, "Cancellations on behalf of the performer are only made under extremely unusual and catastrophic circumstances."
While I try my hardest to accommodate even the most extreme last-minute requests, I can’t always promise that I’ll be free. This is why I recommend that you book me 3 weeks out. This ensures that I’ll be available and have plenty of time to put together a show that’s perfectly planned to fit your needs.
Okay, this is just a weensy suggestion. Perhaps replace the bold with "This will increase the likelihood that I'll be available."? I like to give people the impression that I'm just drowning in bookings, and that a few weeks advance notice is great, but doesn't guarantee anything. Even if most of the time they could call 48 hours in advance and I'd be free as a bird.
OK, Laura - my rapid-fire responses before drifting off to sleep. Go, go, go!
I like your insight on the meetup thing:
I would personally either not mention it at all, or keep it vague like, "It is rare that I have the availability for a face-to-face meeting prior to the event, but requests for such are considered on a case-by-case basis."
That's perfect. I want to be truthful about my stance on face-to-face meetings. Right now, I have all the time in the world since I'm unemployed. But when I have a 9-5, it legitimately is impossible for me to meet everyone who is interested. So it really isn't an ego thing - more like, specific priorities that are set for bigger corporate events where there's an HR presence to meet up with, or weddings where I might have to sit in with a planner. If I had a stunt double, I think I'd be much more amenable to meeting everybody pre-gig!
I eliminated that line item for now, but will rewrite it when I have some brain cells intact. Honestly, my head has been spinning from all of the Devil and all of his Bhuzzing Advocates....not that this is necessarily a bad thing. Just overwhelming.
Okay, this is just a weensy suggestion. Perhaps replace the bold with "This will increase the likelihood that I'll be available."? I like to give people the impression that I'm just drowning in bookings, and that a few weeks advance notice is great, but doesn't guarantee anything. Even if most of the time they could call 48 hours in advance and I'd be free as a bird.
Numero uno rule of b2b sales: always look busy and in-demand
I wish the Search engine didn't cut off your head on your main page. The photograph is so beautiful. I feel its really distracting.
Have you thought about including a video on your site? I'm not sure how necessary it is because you do sell yourself very well. But I would love to see what you do!
Video's the next thing on my to-do list! I used to always go to gigs solo, so until recently, I've never had anyone to videotape me. I'm working on putting together a little montage type thing of some recent clips.
That's really interesting that you bring that up about the search engine guillotine (sp?) effect. Looks fine on my computer, but it might be one of those kooky things that happens on certain browsers.
Even though Brian tested this on pretty much every browser and monitor setting under the sun, glitches often come up during this stage. I'll call this to his attention tomorrow - thanks for the tip!
I very much agree with this. I would echo the poster who said maybe you could have two Twitter accounts? I would want to see a Belly Dancer that I was about to hire tweeting about the glamorous party she's on the way to perform at, or the darling little girls she got up to dance with her at a wedding, etc. In other words, I'd want to do tweets that were completely "in character", if that makes any sense.
I'd like to agree with folks who are not too keen on the Twitter aspect/Twitter on the front page...when I checked out the site there was some tweet about "tanorexics" and I literally said "Eww!" out loud.
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I think the conclusion I've come to is that you just can't please everyone.
*shrug*
Thanks again for all of your feedback. I know what revisions and changes I need to make by now and I'm getting to work on them. Twitter could stand to be used more efficiently and I could put my ad copy on a diet. This is definitely enough homework to keep me going for quite awhile! So I thank those of you who have given me the opportunity to improve.
As for the rest? A lot of the "constructive" feedback can be taken as food for thought, but also as an inevitable difference in stylistic preferences. Some people like light colors, others like dark. Some love social media, others hate it. Some like studio pics, others like live performance shots. On this thread and in my circles outside of Bhuz, my website is getting lots of awesome reviews in addition to the constructive criticism - and from people whose opinions I trust on marketing and public relations. That's the thing about being an artist or an entertainer - everybody has their own way of doing things and that doesn't necessarily mean it's right or wrong. Just different. I'm not even judging at this point, just observing aloud. This could be a spinoff conversation in and of itself, I suppose.
Anyway, if you spot any glitches with the browser or monitor you're on, please feel free to PM me so I can pass this information along to my web guy.
I think the conclusion I've come to is that you just can't please everyone.
*shrug*
Thanks again for all of your feedback. I know what revisions and changes I need to make by now and I'm getting to work on them. Twitter could stand to be used more efficiently and I could put my ad copy on a diet. This is definitely enough homework to keep me going for quite awhile!
As for the rest? A lot of the "constructive" feedback can be taken as food for thought, but also as an inevitable difference in stylistic preferences. Some people like light colors, others like dark. Some love social media, others hate it. Some like studio pics, others like live performance shots. That's the thing about being an artist or an entertainer - everybody has their own way of doing things and that doesn't necessarily mean it's right or wrong. Just different. I'm not even judging at this point, just observing aloud. This could be a spinoff conversation in and of itself, I suppose.
Anyway, if you spot any glitches with the browser or monitor you're on, please feel free to PM me so I can pass this information along to my web guy.
Thanks!
I think the website looks great! Helpful comments and constructive criticism is always helpful, but you have to do what makes you happy!!
English major, here, so I know that red pen feeling. But why is it that it's always easier to edit somebody else's work than it is your own?
Distance. When you read your own work you cannot help but hear what you thought you wrote, or the tone you thought you were striking, when you read...the whole reading out loud helps a bit with the "what you thought you wrote" typos, but not the tone.
It's nothing personal, people producing a professional product require the help of another set of eyes to edit. I sure as hell do.
As for my "eww"...the last thing a naturally thin, and previously tanned, dancer needs on her website is the word "tanorexic" showing up on her front page... even if she is talking about people. So watch the tweet content, or maybe put them later in as people decide that they DO want to get to know you...a bonus.
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That's so true, Oz. This is why I'm giving the major structural and content revisions a couple of weeks before I even begin to tackle them. Sometimes, having something in the forefront of your brain can actually be the biggest hindrance to seeing things the way they are.
I have gotten a couple of good tips here for how to re-word and reconceptualize a couple of the points I addressed. That's good stuff!
Plus, I'm thinking some of the sticky topics like rates might be better expressed in a tactful and insightful blog entry than an FAQ section, anyway.
Thank goodness I can update this site 100% at my convenience. It may be the project that never, ever ends.
On my 12'' laptop monitor (1024by768), using firefox the header looks like a splash screen. I don't even see the menu. Under Microsoft Explorer I think it's even more confusing. The header takes almost all of the monitor space, but the menu is seen. Once you click on one of the items, you get... well you get to see the header & the menu again, it just feels buggy to the Software Engineer specializing in Graphical User Interfaces in me. I would strongly suggest to make the header even smaller...
Another thing that bothered me is the large font size. It's true that it's easier to read but the amount of scrolling could be tiring...
Other than that congrats!!! I loved the header, all those swirls coming out of your hair, you are stunning!!! The pics in the gallery are amazing! I also noted your make up, so gentle and flattering!
P.S. In addition to Google analytics are you using Google Web master tools? A great addition to your toolbox. I am not sure if Wordpress can use it, but you should try.
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So it really isn't an ego thing - more like, specific priorities that are set for bigger corporate events where there's an HR presence to meet up with, or weddings where I might have to sit in with a planner.
I just wanted to clarify that I didn't think you personally felt that lower profile clients were peons, just that the copy could possibly give that impression. I have the same policy as you about face-to-face meetings, but I don't let the clients know that there is a hierarchy of gigs in my mind.
One thing I learned working with clients in a corporate environment is that letting them each one of them think they were my "main" client got some really great results. The $35K guy had no idea that I was always placing his ads at the last minute, because I gave first priority to placing ads for the $2M+ ones. So I carried that over to my BD business when I started it.
i'm on a small laptop too most of the time, and it took me some time to figure out i had to scroll down...
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Originally Posted by jewelbellydance
Yes, to be honest, it wasn't obvious to me either. I am working on a laptop, so the photo and menu buttons fit perfectly to my screen - so it looks like that's all there is. I did figure out to scroll down, and thought 'Hmm, that's a little annoying', but then thought it was just a design choice aimed at making the veiwer remember your lovely picture.
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ALL Web sites should be like that. There is nothing worse than stale content.
Goddddd I know. It's such a turnoff for me, if I can't see what my favorite people in the world are up to! Plus, it's just plain bad SEO to not be current. You know how it is. LOL.
One thing I learned working with clients in a corporate environment is that letting them each one of them think they were my "main" client got some really great results. The $35K guy had no idea that I was always placing his ads at the last minute, because I gave first priority to placing ads for the $2M+ ones. So I carried that over to my BD business when I started it.
It's interesting how b2b sales spills into our BD lives, isn't it? I hated selling radio advertising, but it was amazing "cross-training" for the business of dance.
I simply omitted that question, since it doesn't really come up often enough in my usual interactions with clients. Usually, it's a corporate thing and in that case, I always feel that it's legit. Large corporations have to take much greater measures to protect their reputations than most average Joes and Janes - often, pre-gig meetings are an exercise for HR more so than anything.
As always, your input has been very valuable to me on this thread, so thanks a million!
I think your new website is beautiful. It's unique and really seems to give a glimpse into who you are. You've gotten a lot of good suggestions/feedback here already so I don't have anything further to add. I've just spent the last 2 hours looking up the code and then doing a bunch of thumbnails for my new DIY site that I'm hoping to have finished by August, so I understand that it's always a work in progress, you learn as you go. You should be proud of you new site!!
P.S. I use Firefox and don't have to scroll horizontally at all, the graphic appears with the menus below it, I have my browser window max'd. Just thought you'd like to know. It looks great!
Your site looks awesome! I envy people who can figure out DIY web design. I tried it and ended up in a fetal position, rocking back and forth.
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Oh, me too! I just tried to change the password on the backend of my website, to allow a web developer to take a look at it, and I corrupted the whole system and lost all email access. Just trying to change a damn password! This is why I hire other people to do this stuff. From now on, I solemnly swear never to tamper with my backend ever again. Forthwith, I will stick to bellydancing and leave all technical stuff to Those Who Know.
PS - I can now just see the top of your text on my laptop screen (which is not minimised). It's a little annoying to have so much text cut off, but I now clearly know to scroll down. Oh, and I loooove the way your hair turns into swirls. Magic!
Linear Mode
