"Let's have dinner! (or lunch, or drinks, or...."

[danidance]

Why is it that as soon as you get serious and motivated to diet, more people than ever before decide to invite you out for food?

What are the strategies - just declining? I guess that's the easiest and I try to use it as much as possible.

It's amazing how dependent we are on the social food and drink ritual and how seductive it is. I mean, what do you do when you get together with people after all - you gotta have snacks and wine unless it's work or class or something. (and I love doing this!)

I feel like telling everyone I know to not invite me anywhere for anything for the next 3 months - it's too hard!

[tamrahennatx]

Why don't you suggest getting together for a walk in the park or a practice session instead? You can easily have a conversation doing both of these activities, and you'll be burning calories at the same time!

[*Shira*]

Originally Posted by danidance

What are the strategies - just declining? I guess that's the easiest and I try to use it as much as possible.

If we're meeting at a restaurant, I order a nice salad with only a lemon to squeeze over it and I drink sparkling water with a twist of lemon or lime. Otherwise, if it's in someone's home, I bring a snack tray from the grocery store with carrots and celery sticks, salsa and hummous for dipping, and sparkling water.

In the Weight Watchers system, which is what I used for my 55-pound weight loss in 1999, most vegetables were 0 points at the time (the program may have changed since then) - the fiber offset the calories. And that meant they were "free", I could eat as much as I wanted without it counting against mydaily allowance. Most salad ingredients were "free" and the lemon juice squeezed over it negligible (not even a point in such a small quantity). Carrots, celery, and salsa are all zero points; hummus has some points because of the oil in it, but I figure it's worth it because I'm always looking for ways to get my 5 servings of fruits & vegetables every day anyway.

[danidance]

good ideas!

The real killers are the work related things. It's hard to bring stuff to those kind of events. I got invited to last minute work-related lunch tomorrow and i'm looking forward to it but I will need to be cautious. I'll try to have some free point veggies and fruit before I go so that I'm not too hungry when I get there and end up tempted.

I am for sure going to start suggesting walks or such for getting together AND bringing vegetable platters to get togethers.

[chessurecat]

You know, just this past Friday, a girl friend invited me to her brother's house for Pirate night since it was the release of Pirates3. When she called me that night she says, "Come on over a few hours early if you can, I'm grilling." Well, I figured:
1) There will be nothing for me to eat that's healthy since I'm a vegetarian.
2) there will be nothing for me to eat that's healthy since I'm on a diet.
But, I went anyway since I need conversation and a social life (whole different story, I won't bore you with it).
I was sooooo pleasantly surprised! My friend had grilled Portobella mushrooms, Zucchini and asparagus for me (jerk chicken for everyone else...they ARE Pirates, after all)!!! She had tortilla strips and hummus for me so I wasn't stuck with the other junk food.
It took ALL my will power to restrain from the Rum Bar, but I managed (boy was THAT exhausting!!).
This was the first time someone had actually paid attention to my needs as a dieter, especially a vegetarian dieter!!
I think I hugged her soo many times, I embarrased her.
Oooo....I was also very good at the theatre....not ONE order of ANYTHING, no popcorn, diet soda, NOTHING. Yeay. This is a HUGE feat for me.

[chessurecat]

On another note:
At the shop I work in, we get three breaks a day per shift...15 min at 10a.m., 30 min at 12:45p.m. and 15 min at 2:45 p.m.
Each and every one of my co-workers is OBSESSED with eating anything they can think of at every break.

10a.m. breaks ALWAYS consist of some bakery item that's usually smothered in some sort of glaze.

12:45 break ALWAYS looks like a rest. buffet. You can't see an inch of the tabletop since it's COVERED in everyone's slop and dishes. On Fridays, forget it! Friday is ALWAYS order-out day (chinese food, Culver's, Burger King, Taco Bell, Arby's, whatever...).

2:45 break usually has some sort of pretzel bowl, chip bowl,left over's from 10a.m. break, what-have-you.

They organize cook-outs and pot-lucks 1 - 2 times a month...every month.

They wonder why I'm anti-social and don't join them. When I say "Thank you, but I really need to watch what I eat," someone always says something they think is witty like "Oh, it's only Krispy Creme, they're like eating AIR." or "But it's whole wheat donuts and the cocoa bean used to make this chocolate frosting is considered a vegetable, so you can eat it....less calories and no animals in it." Ugh.
If it IS something I can actually eat, they mock my single palm-size serving with no seconds.
Never mind the fact that one of these women weigh so much, she needed a knee replacement since she slipped on ice in the Winter time (couldn't support her own weight anymore!!).

[chessurecat]

Originally Posted by danidance

good ideas!

bringing vegetable platters to get togethers.

This is what I do ....I'm usually the only one to eat it.......
see above post for referrence.

[*Shira*]

Originally Posted by chessurecat

This is what I do ....I'm usually the only one to eat it.......

Kael, I look at it this way - I choose veggies for the platter that I enjoy eating myself. If there are some (even a lot) left over, I take them home and have delicious snacks for the next several days!

[chessurecat]

Originally Posted by *Shira*

Kael, I look at it this way - I choose veggies for the platter that I enjoy eating myself. If there are some (even a lot) left over, I take them home and have delicious snacks for the next several days!

Absolutely!

[antimony]

Whenever we have a "food day" at work, someone too lazy to cook always brings a veggie platter... I love those teeny tiny carrots that are in the platters (they're smaller than the ones in the bags of baby carrots) No one else bothers with the veggies, so I always eat all of the carrots! (And usually all the tomatoes too!) I just plant myself by the platter and keep my hands and mouth busy, and I manage to avoid all of the other crap pretty easily.

[Bellydancingcaroline]

Originally Posted by chessurecat

On another note:
they mock my single palm-size serving with no seconds.
Never mind the fact that one of these women weigh so much, she needed a knee replacement since she slipped on ice in the Winter time (couldn't support her own weight anymore!!).

They are probably insecure people, and your willpower underlines their flaws.

[Bellydancingcaroline]

Oh, I have said "I'll join you for coffee" and turned up towards the end of the meal. I have eaten Before I went out, so was able to order something really light. Or there is always suchi

[Lauren_]

I've been struggling with this too. Restaurants are a minefield! I try to go online & look up the restaurant's nutrition info if possible, on their site or on dietfacts.com. Some restaurants don't make their info available at ALL, so I look at the menu online and look up comparable items on dietfacts.

When all else fails, I've learned that soup is usually the best choice on the menu. Way better even than salads at most restaurants. A bowl of yummy soup & glass of water with lemon goes great with good company!

[danidance]

So I took everyone's advice today - I went to the Farmers' Market and bought a gorgeous basket of mixed berries - blackberries, raspberries and blueberries - it was so pretty. I took that as the "gift" rather than a bottle of wine.

The hostess is a really fit woman so I should have known she'd have healthy food - which she did. I only ate a couple of half-dollar sized slices of grilled pork roast (dee-licious), salad and a couple of spoons of couscous. I put it all on a small plate instead of a big one and I was happy as a clam. I did have a glass of white wine - couldn't resist that as one of the guests owns a vineyard and I had to try their label. No dessert but some berries.

When I got home it was about 4:30 and I was hungry so I had a small Jenny Craig snack. Now I'm sitting her after the Jillina show (which was outrageously good by the way--truly outstanding) having a big arugula salad.

all in all I socialized without killing my diet. whew.

[danidance]

The one thing I'm finding is that I don't need a whole dinner order - I'm insisting on sharing things from now on. Every single entree I order is always too much food. Save money and calories by splitting is gonna be my new rule!
(that and soup which I always love anyway)

Originally Posted by Lauren_

I've been struggling with this too. Restaurants are a minefield! I try to go online & look up the restaurant's nutrition info if possible, on their site or on dietfacts.com. Some restaurants don't make their info available at ALL, so I look at the menu online and look up comparable items on dietfacts.

When all else fails, I've learned that soup is usually the best choice on the menu. Way better even than salads at most restaurants. A bowl of yummy soup & glass of water with lemon goes great with good company!

[antimony]

It's funny, the same people who roll their eyes and make disparaging comments if you order a salad don't bat an eyelash if you order a bowl of soup for dinner!

[danidance]

I'm having my favorite new snack now so I thought I'd share - an oldie but goodie - fresh strawberries with balsamic vinegar. god is it good! and so healthy!

[*Shira*]

Originally Posted by danidance

The one thing I'm finding is that I don't need a whole dinner order - I'm insisting on sharing things from now on. Every single entree I order is always too much food. Save money and calories by splitting is gonna be my new rule! (that and soup which I always love anyway)

Another option: some restaurants have appetizers that are nutritious and perfectly sufficient as a main course. I've had some lovely bacon-wrapped oysters, shrimp cocktails, bacon-wrapped dates, lobster pizza, and other goodies as main courses. Add a dinner salad and if really hungry a side dish of steamed vegetables, and there's plenty of food to satisfy me.

Of course, some restaurants have appetizers that are entirely incompatible with weight loss, such as deep-fat-fried mozarrella sticks, fatty quesadillas, deep-fat-fried mushrooms, and such. In those places, I go for soup and salad.

[tahiradancer]

A lot of LA restaurants do a 3 sides (veggies) as a main dish. Most chefs are happy to do this. Another option is to ask for a to go box when you order. YOu IMMEDIATELY split the meal into two portions and get it out of sight. This option is best if you are amoung friends who understand the tendancy to continue to munch even after you have sinished what you are actually hungry for.

{{{HUGS}}}

[asimatiyat]

One of my best friends is a guy who looks like he never eats. When I hug him, he feels like a skeleton in a t-shirt. The truth is, though, that he eats plenty, and one of his favorite social activities is getting together with friends for dessert. Coincidentally, this friend happens to live in the same building as I do, which is across the street from a 24-hour diner with a wide and delicious selection of pies.

I am never, ever going to lose this extra weight, am I?